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Applied logic
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15727
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 8:16 pm    Post subject: Applied logic Reply with quote

Two builders (Vince and Gelan) are seated either side of a table in a pub when a well-dressed man enters (Stovey), orders a beer and sits on a stool at the bar.

The two builders start to speculate about the occupation of the suit.

Gelan: - I reckon he's an accountant.

Vince: - No way - he's a stockbroker.


Gelan: - He ain't no stockbroker! A stockbroker wouldn't come in here!


The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer gets the better of Gelan and he makes for the toilet.


On entering the toilet he sees that the suit is standing at a urinal.


Curiosity and the several beers get the better of him.

Gelan: - 'Scuse me.... no offence meant, but me and me mate were wondering what you do for a living?

Stovey: - No offence taken! I'm a Logical Scientist by profession

Gelan: - Oh? What's that then?

Stovey: - I'll try to explain by example ... Do you have a goldfish at home?


Gelan: - Er ... mmm ... well yeah, I do as it happens!

Stovey: - Well, it's logical that you keep it either in a bowl or in a pond. Which is it?

Gelan: - It's in a pond!

Stovey: - Well it's reasonable to suppose that you have a large garden then?

Gelan: - As it happens, yes I have got a big garden.

Stovey: - Well then it's logical to assume that, in this town, if you have a large garden then you have a large house?

Gelan: - As it happens I've got a five bedroom house .... built it myself!

Suit: - Well given that you've built a five bedroom house it's logical to assume that you haven't built it just for yourself and that you are quite probably married? And with a family?

Gelan: - Yes I am married, I live with my wife and four children.

Stovey: - Well then it is logical to assume that you are sexually active with your wife on a regular basis?

Gelan: - Yep! Five times a week!

Stovey: - Well then it is logical to suggest that you don't masturbate very often?


Gelan: - Do what? Not me, mate!

Stovey: - Well there you are! That's logical science at work!

Gelan: - How's that then?

Stovey: - Well from finding out that you had a goldfish, I've told you about your sex life!

Gelan: - I see! That's pretty impressive. Thanks mate!

Both leave the toilet and Dave returns to his mate.

Vince: - I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what he does?

Gelan: - Yep! He's a logical scientist!

Vince: - What's that then?

Gelan: - I'll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?

Vince: - Nope

Gelan: - Well then, you're a wanker wtf Shocked Mad Laughing


Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)


Last edited by Vince on Mon Oct 25, 2010 7:45 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Suzanne
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Joined: Jun 27, 2009
Posts: 3323
Location: Eugene, Oregon

PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 8:46 pm    Post subject: Re: Applied logic Reply with quote

Oh MY My!!!

That was good!

Suz

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May the moon keep you centered,
May the sun keep you dancing,
And the stars shed light on your dreams.
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gelandangan
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6403
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 12:14 am    Post subject: Re: Applied logic Reply with quote

BWAHAHAHAHAA

Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha

Strewth!!!

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A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
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slimjim
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Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 8316
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 5:43 am    Post subject: Re: Applied logic Reply with quote

Oh, thanks for the chuckle, Vince! Gelan's first name is Dave?

_________________
"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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Bushmaster
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11395
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 7:30 am    Post subject: Re: Applied logic Reply with quote

Now ya gone and done it, Vince. Gelandangan was trying to keep it a secret...

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DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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gelandangan
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6403
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 4:58 pm    Post subject: Re: Applied logic Reply with quote

Very Happy
Ne'er mind my name mate, gelan would do..

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A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

Do - Not try!


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