Now this is just plain weird.

Vince · Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 9:49 pm Post subject: Now this is just plain weird.

What the blazes do they put in the water in Utah??? Must be pretty strong stuff.

Nude Woman in Utah Steals Two Cars in Year's Weirdest Chase
(Now With Mug Shot!)

A naked woman in Utah stole a car, crashed it, and hid in a bush before stealing a police car. And that's not even the whole story.

It's kind of a long tale, so bear with me. A guy is standing outside his car in West Valley, Utah, putting up roadside signs at around five in the morning on Tuesday. A woman pulls up next to him, and jumps out of her car. She is naked. She hops into his car and drives off. So, obviously, he gets into her car and gives chase, calling the police. She misses a turn at some point, and crashes on some property owned by a company called Alliant Technologies.

Her car stuck, she escapes on foot. (She is still nude.) Police and Alliant security search the property, only to find our suspect hiding out behind a bush. Unbowed, the alleged (nude) carjacker makes a run directly at a police officer, who attempts to restrain her. Because she is a little bloody (from the crash) and a little sweaty (from being a nude person running around), she literally slips through their fingers.

At which point she gets in one of the cop cars. The police attempt to drag her out of the car; she drives away on a dirt road, still on the Alliant property. She crashes through another fence, hits a dirt berm, and launches the car in the air for about 50 feet, bringing her journey to a halt. Escaping into the woods, she comes across a barbed-wire fence, which she scales, only to find cops waiting for her. Out of options, they taser her. Fin.

I don't even know where to start! Which is the best part? Obviously, her nudity is bizarre and the main point of interest. But what about the original victim, who drove her car in pursuit? And why did she have a car in the first place? And the hiding in the bushes? And giving the cops the literal slip? And the Dukes of Hazzard stunt, and the barbed-wire fence? What is going on in Utah?

The real hero in the whole story, though, is West Valley police Captain Tom McLachlan, who seems to have related this story to the news media. McLachlan is a master of the understated one-liner:

* On the suspect's appearance: "Of course, there was no clothing description available."

* On the suspect's navigational abilities: "One turn she did not even attempt to negotiate."

* One the police vehicle's status: "I think there's a hubcap that's still usable."

* On motive: "It appears there may be mental issues involved."

I couldn't put it better myself.

Update:

Looks like our suspect is Sylvina Beagley, a 31-year-old from Kearns, Utah. Thanks to commenters jconchj and bradyb, I've added her mugshot.

And, now, some bonus Tom McLachlan quotes from that KSL story:

* On the distinctive nature of this incident: "Unique thing about that was that, uh she was not wearing any clothes."

* On the suspect's personal hygiene: "She did have blood on her body from the initial crash. She was hot and sweaty, dirty, and very slippery. She managed to escape the grasp of the two officers."

Cheers, Vince

Erny · Member Joined: May 13, 2010 Posts: 130 Location: Brisbane

if that story was in Victoria, i would have bet it was my dear 80 year old Mum, trying to get to the pokies! Very Happy

Cheers erny.

radar · Posted: Sat Jun 26, 2010 2:36 am Post subject: Re: Now this is just plain weird.

Wheres the mugshot!
She must be HOT!
LOL

radar

Vince · Posted: Sat Jun 26, 2010 4:47 am Post subject: Re: Now this is just plain weird.

radar wrote:

Wheres the mugshot!
She must be HOT!
Laughing

radar

She's got a head like a smashed crab mate. Check it out.

A "window licker" for sure.

Cheers, Vince

radar · Posted: Sun Jun 27, 2010 3:01 pm Post subject: Re: Now this is just plain weird.

Yep - shes had a mince pie thrown at her thats for sure.....

Vince · Posted: Sun Jun 27, 2010 6:46 pm Post subject: Re: Now this is just plain weird.

Fell out of the UGLY tree and bounced off every branch methinks Radar.

Cheers, Vince

radar · Posted: Sun Jun 27, 2010 8:40 pm Post subject: Re: Now this is just plain weird.

I hereby retract my HOT comment !

d_hoffman

Was there any mention of a fire? Because she looks like someone lit her face on fire and tried to put it out with a pick-axe.

PaulS

Man, you guys are harsh!
I admit that the picture is not very flattering but it is a mug shot and not a "glamour" photo. If you saw her on the street in make up she might not enlist the same comments.
I hate photos anyway because they only capture the physical in a moment in time and does not express the soul or personna of the individual.
I proposed to my wife sight unseen - we "met" on the internet and I constantly refused any pictures. I chose to get to know who she was before we met and I proposed to her a full month before we ever met. I didn't change my mind after meeting her because I was already in love with her. I still am.

radar · Posted: Mon Jun 28, 2010 1:41 am Post subject: Re: Now this is just plain weird.

You're a braver man than I Paul, may I say though that I met my wife aged 20, got engaged after 6 weeks and have been married 21 years this December so I do beleive in Love at first sight.

44marty · Posted: Mon Jun 28, 2010 6:39 am Post subject: Re: Now this is just plain weird.

PaulS wrote:

Man, you guys are harsh!

I proposed to my wife sight unseen - we "met" on the internet and I constantly refused any pictures. I chose to get to know who she was before we met and I proposed to her a full month before we ever met. I didn't change my mind after meeting her because I was already in love with her. I still am.

HOLY CR^P !!! You have got to be the bravest man I've ever heard of. What if she had been a 450 pound plus beast with no concept of personal hygeine? (I am assuming she's not, since you married her.)

Erny · Member Joined: May 13, 2010 Posts: 130 Location: Brisbane

PaulS wrote:

Man, you guys are harsh!
I admit that the picture is not very flattering but it is a mug shot and not a "glamour" photo. If you saw her on the street in make up she might not enlist the same comments.
I hate photos anyway because they only capture the physical in a moment in time and does not express the soul or personna of the individual.
I proposed to my wife sight unseen - we "met" on the internet and I constantly refused any pictures. I chose to get to know who she was before we met and I proposed to her a full month before we ever met. I didn't change my mind after meeting her because I was already in love with her. I still am.

Why does that not surprise me Jeti? Laughing

I actually went out with my wife for a full year before we were intimate, (for a better word). Still after 25years together, through thick & thin, she is still my best mate! Very Happy

And still laugh & enjoy life together! Love

stovepipe

Vince wrote:

She's got a head like a smashed crab mate. Check it out. A "window licker" for sure. Cheers, Vince

.....dangit! coffee thru the nose, again!

Haha

PaulS · Posted: Mon Jun 28, 2010 9:00 pm Post subject: Re: Now this is just plain weird.

I suppose that if she looked more like a camel than a woman i would have married her anyway. I fell in love with who she was not what she looked like. Maybe I lucked out and got good looks on top of the woman I love but when you find the right woman looks really are second to the other.

Azar · Member Joined: Jan 04, 2010 Posts: 275 Location: Utah

If I were to wager a guess (besides it being possible "mental problems") I'd say Meth. For whatever reason, Meth is the boutique drug of choice in Utah right now. A real problem.