HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: IPutMoInYoA
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 13131

People Online:
Members: 1
Visitors: 205
BOT: 2
Total: 208
Who Is Where:
 Members:
01: Elvis > Home
 Visitors:
01: Photo Albums
02: Forums
03: Forums
04: Your Account
05: Your Account
06: Forums
07: Forums
08: Home
09: Forums
10: Photo Albums
11: Forums
12: Forums
13: Photo Albums
14: Home
15: Forums
16: Forums
17: Forums
18: Forums
19: Home
20: Home
21: Forums
22: Your Account
23: Forums
24: Home
25: Home
26: Home
27: Forums
28: Forums
29: Forums
30: Forums
31: Photo Albums
32: Forums
33: Forums
34: Forums
35: Home
36: Forums
37: Forums
38: Forums
39: Home
40: Forums
41: Forums
42: Forums
43: Forums
44: Forums
45: Forums
46: Home
47: Photo Albums
48: Forums
49: Forums
50: Photo Albums
51: Your Account
52: Home
53: Forums
54: Forums
55: Forums
56: Home
57: Forums
58: Forums
59: Forums
60: Home
61: Home
62: Forums
63: Forums
64: Forums
65: Forums
66: Forums
67: Home
68: Forums
69: Forums
70: Home
71: Forums
72: Forums
73: Your Account
74: Forums
75: Forums
76: Home
77: Forums
78: Home
79: Forums
80: Forums
81: Forums
82: Forums
83: Forums
84: Forums
85: Forums
86: Forums
87: Forums
88: Forums
89: Your Account
90: Forums
91: Home
92: Home
93: Forums
94: Forums
95: Statistics
96: Forums
97: Forums
98: Forums
99: Forums
100: Forums
101: Home
102: Forums
103: Forums
104: Forums
105: Forums
106: Forums
107: Photo Albums
108: Forums
109: Forums
110: Photo Albums
111: Forums
112: Forums
113: Photo Albums
114: Home
115: Forums
116: Forums
117: Forums
118: Home
119: Forums
120: Photo Albums
121: Forums
122: Forums
123: Your Account
124: Photo Albums
125: Forums
126: Home
127: Forums
128: Forums
129: Forums
130: Forums
131: Photo Albums
132: Forums
133: Photo Albums
134: Forums
135: Home
136: Forums
137: Forums
138: Forums
139: Home
140: Forums
141: Forums
142: Forums
143: Your Account
144: Home
145: Forums
146: Home
147: Forums
148: Forums
149: Forums
150: Forums
151: Forums
152: Forums
153: Your Account
154: Forums
155: Forums
156: Photo Albums
157: Forums
158: Forums
159: Your Account
160: Forums
161: Home
162: Forums
163: Forums
164: Your Account
165: Forums
166: News
167: Forums
168: Forums
169: Forums
170: Forums
171: Your Account
172: Photo Albums
173: Forums
174: Your Account
175: Forums
176: Forums
177: Forums
178: Forums
179: Home
180: Forums
181: Photo Albums
182: Home
183: Forums
184: Forums
185: Home
186: Forums
187: Photo Albums
188: Forums
189: Forums
190: Home
191: Forums
192: Forums
193: Privacy Policy
194: Home
195: Home
196: Photo Albums
197: Home
198: Forums
199: Forums
200: Forums
201: Home
202: Home
203: Home
204: Forums
205: Forums
  BOT:
01: Forums
02: Your Account

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 308
 Pictures: 2452
  · Views: 824590
  · Votes: 1316
  · Comments: 86
 

Military
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15721
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Wed May 06, 2009 4:28 am    Post subject: Military Reply with quote

Drafting Guys over 60----this is obviously written by a Former Soldier.

New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters:

Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some a$$hole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical S-O-B....

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million p1ssed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

***How about recruiting Women over 50...with PMS !! You think Men have attitudes !! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!!

If nothing else, put us on border patrol....we will have it secured the first night!

Share this with your senior friends. It's purposely in big type so they can read it.


Works for me.

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
slots918
Member
Member


Joined: Jun 28, 2008
Posts: 138

PostPosted: Fri May 08, 2009 1:47 pm    Post subject: Re: Military Reply with quote

Good un
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT - 7 Hours



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by *Dizfunkshunal* :.