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Get the bull
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Tremblay
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 2656
Location: Malta, Montana

PostPosted: Thu May 07, 2020 7:11 pm    Post subject: Get the bull Reply with quote

Blond

Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull from the stockyard in a far town so that they can breed their own stock.

They only have $600 left. Upon leaving, the brunette tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home."

The brunette arrives at the stockyard, inspects the bull, and decides she wants to buy it. The man tells her that he will sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news.

She walks into the telegraph office and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home."

The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, "It's just 99 cents a word." Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only has $1 left. She realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word.

After a few minutes of thinking, she nods and says, "I want you to send her one word: comfortable."

The operator shakes his head. 'How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her just the word "comfortable?"

The brunette explains, "My sister's a blonde. The word is big. She'll read it very slowly ... com-for-da-bull."

_________________
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. - Mark
Twain

Never argue with a stupid person ,cause they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. Mark Twwain
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Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11394
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Fri May 08, 2020 8:07 am    Post subject: Re: Get the bull Reply with quote

Only in Montana...

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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slimjim
Super Member
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Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 8316
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Fri May 08, 2020 11:17 am    Post subject: Re: Get the bull Reply with quote

Thanks for the chuckle, Trembray. Its good to get a few of those a day.

_________________
"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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English Mike
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jan 08, 2007
Posts: 1709
Location: Whitehaven, Cumbria, UK

PostPosted: Fri May 08, 2020 2:42 pm    Post subject: Re: Get the bull Reply with quote

Blonde goes to the doctor complaining that she gets agonising pain wherever she touches her body.
Doc asks her to demonstrate, so she pokes herself with a finger in the arm, chest, stomach, legs, feet & does indeed show signs of suffering severe pain.

Doc says...

..."you've broken your finger...".
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Bushmaster
Super Member
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11394
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Fri May 08, 2020 4:18 pm    Post subject: Re: Get the bull Reply with quote

I don't have any "blonde" jokes. Instead I have a "blonde" wife.

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15721
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri May 08, 2020 4:48 pm    Post subject: Re: Get the bull Reply with quote

Bushmaster wrote:
I don't have any "blonde" jokes. Instead I have a "blonde" wife.

...and no way would I tell her a blonde joke mate...I don’t have a death wish. Poke scared scared scared

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Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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