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Online Management Course
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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mc223
Member
Member


Joined: Apr 02, 2006
Posts: 115
Location: S/E Kansas

PostPosted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 11:43 am    Post subject: Online Management Course Reply with quote

Subject: FW: your three-minute management course.



LESSON ONE:

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him,
"Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"

The eagle answered:
"Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below

the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared,
jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
>

Management Lesson

===================

If you want to sit and do nothing, you must be sitting very,

very high up.

LESSON TWO:=============
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able
to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I
haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?"

replied the bull.
"They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at
a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough

strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next

day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second
branch.
>

Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly

perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted

by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
>

Management Lesson:

===================

BS might get you to the top, but it won't keep you

there.
>

LESSON THREE:============
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold,
the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.

While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped

some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the

dung he realized it was actually thawing him out! He lay
there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to

investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the

bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out
and ate him.

Management Lesson

===================

===================

Not everyone who s___s on you is your enemy.

Not everyone who gets you out of s___s is your friend.

And when you're in deep s__t, it's best to keep your

mouth shut!
>

This completes your three-minute management course.
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Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14872
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 6:59 pm    Post subject: Re: Online Management Course Reply with quote

Ain't this the truth.

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Tremblay
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 2315
Location: Malta, Montana

PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 10:11 am    Post subject: Re: Online Management Course Reply with quote

that is a good one MC

_________________
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. - Mark
Twain

Never argue with a stupid person ,cause they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. Mark Twwain
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Aloysius
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 03, 2009
Posts: 2288
Location: B., Belgium

PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 11:23 am    Post subject: Re: Online Management Course Reply with quote

Tremblay wrote:
that is a good one MC

maybe a little bit molded? Or did they already add a good moldinhibitor to jokes in 2006? Smile
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gelandangan
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6166
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 1:40 pm    Post subject: Re: Online Management Course Reply with quote

incredible! another spammer insert here ..
Shameless ba5tard

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
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English Mike
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jan 08, 2007
Posts: 1696
Location: Whitehaven, Cumbria, UK

PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 2:14 pm    Post subject: Re: Online Management Course Reply with quote

gelandangan wrote:
incredible! another spammer insert here ..
Shameless ba5tard

I just PM'ed Dallan about it & the other one in the Christmas present thread.

Bloody pests. Mad
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Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 8536
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2012 6:32 pm    Post subject: Re: Online Management Course Reply with quote

English Mike wrote:
gelandangan wrote:
incredible! another spammer insert here ..
Shameless ba5tard

I just PM'ed Dallan about it & the other one in the Christmas present thread.

Bloody pests. Mad
pity we cant sit them out at 250 yrds and give them the proper pest treatment Mad
as for the original jokes about BS etc
very good ta for the chuckle Ive read about the sparrow before but the others were new to me.

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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