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AUSSIE CULTURE
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Author Message
Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15721
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Apr 15, 2006 3:29 am    Post subject: AUSSIE CULTURE Reply with quote

A bit of Aussie culcha


LOG ON: Adding wood to make the BBQ hotter.

LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the BBQ.

MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the BBQ.

DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the Ute (truck).

HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies (beer).

KEYBOARD: Where you hang the Ute keys.

WINDOW: What you shut when the weather's cold.

SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season.

BYTE: What mozzies do.

MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies (in the tropics)do.

CHIP: A bar snack.

MICROCHIP: What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips.

MODEM: What you did to the lawns.

LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps.

SOFTWARE: Plastic knives & forks you get at Red Rooster.

HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives & forks - from K-Mart.

MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed.

MAINFRAME: What hold's the shed up.

WEB: What spiders make.

WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the verandah.

SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the Ute won't go.

CURSOR: What you say when the Ute won't go.

YAHOO: What you say when the Ute does go.

UPGRADE: A steep hill.

SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.

MAIL SERVER: The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.

USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things.

NETWORK: What you do when you need to repair the fishing net.

INTERNET: Where you want the fish to go.

NETSCAPE: What the fish do when they discover the hole in the net.

ONLINE: Where you hang the washing.

OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough.


Well there ya go, a bit of aussie cultcha, although I'm sure this would fit in many places. Very Happy Laughing Very Happy Laughing

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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