cats
Go to page 1, 2  Next  :| |:
-> Jokes & Humor

#1: cats Author: dhc4everLocation: Ipswich, Queensland Australia PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 3:07 am
    ----
Adam and Eve said, “Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us.”

And God said, “I will create a companion for you that will be with you and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourselves.”

And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam and Eve.

And it was a good animal.

And God was pleased.

And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve and he wagged his tail.

And Adam said, “Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal.”

And God said, ” I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, and you will call him DOG.”

And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to them and loved them.

And they were comforted.

And God was pleased.

And Dog was content and wagged his tail.

After a while, it came to pass that an angel came to the Lord and said, “Lord, Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like peacocks and they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that they are loved, but perhaps too well.”

And God said, “I will create for them a companion who will be with them and who will see them as they are. The companion will remind them of their limitations, so they will know that they are not always worthy of adoration.”

And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.

And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam and Eve gazed into Cat’s eyes, they were reminded that they were not the supreme beings.

And Adam and Eve learned humility.

And they were greatly improved.

And God was pleased.

And Dog was happy.

And Cat didn’t give a crap one way or the other.

#2: Re: cats Author: SuzanneLocation: Eugene, Oregon PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 6:06 am
    ----
Ain't it true!



Suz

#3: Re: cats Author: BushmasterLocation: Ava, Missouri PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 8:30 am
    ----
I have been told that DOG serves man and man serves CAT. To CAT we are "staff".

#4: Re: cats Author: PaulSLocation: South-Eastern Washington - the State PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 4:35 pm
    ----
I don't know... I have taught two cats to sit, roll over and lie down on command. You just have to use a different thought pattern with cats than with dogs - that and remember that the cat is not really there to please anyone but themselves - kind of like an addict.

#5: Re: cats Author: radarLocation: North Island New Zealand PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 5:55 pm
    ----
What were your cats addicted to Paul….I'm interested ….

#6: Re: cats Author: dhc4everLocation: Ipswich, Queensland Australia PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 1:26 am
    ----
Didnt happen without video Paul........
I'd be interested as well, all I get is a distainful stare at anytime except meal time.

#7: Re: cats Author: VinceLocation: Brisbane AUSTRALIA PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 5:06 am
    ----
Bushy got it in one...cats don't have owners, they have staff.

When. Cat is licking you it isn't showing affection...it is tasting you for future reference.

#8: Re: cats Author: TremblayLocation: Malta, Montana PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 7:26 am
    ----
Cat is licking you it isn't showing affection...it is tasting you for future reference

HEHAW

#9: Re: cats Author: gelandanganLocation: Sydney Australia PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 2:05 pm
    ----
Cat? where? Blooompfht!!

#10: Re: cats Author: DallanCLocation: Utah PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 2:27 pm
    ----
Here's a cat I wouldn't mind:

www.youtube.com/embed/...r_embedded


-DallanC

#11: Re: cats Author: dhc4everLocation: Ipswich, Queensland Australia PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 2:36 pm
    ----
Just saw this on the morning news, very unusual cat behaviour, but well done that cat.
The dog needs a bullet.

#12: Re: cats Author: DallanCLocation: Utah PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 2:41 pm
    ----
I had a cat growing up, MEAN ole Tom, he was kindof the same way. Didn't allow any dogs on "his" turf. He was all torn up by the end of his life, ears shredded, scars all over. Mean SOB for sure.


-DallanC

#13: Re: cats Author: gelandanganLocation: Sydney Australia PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 3:14 pm
    ----
Well Ok, thats an exception.. I may even tolerate that cat..

#14: Re: cats Author: TremblayLocation: Malta, Montana PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 4:28 pm
    ----
Now that's a cat

#15: Re: cats Author: SuzanneLocation: Eugene, Oregon PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 6:16 pm
    ----
That was cool, wouldn't it be interesting to see a close-up in slow motion of the cat and dog, just to see where the cat actually contacted, because that dog really scooted.

Suz



-> Jokes & Humor

All times are GMT - 7 Hours

Go to page 1, 2  Next  :| |:
Page 1 of 2