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"THEN and NOW"Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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1895ss Super Member


Joined: Jul 21, 2005 Posts: 2612 Location: Not Here...!!
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Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2006 8:44 pm Post subject: "THEN and NOW" |
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Scenario: Jack pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack.
1963 - Vice Principal comes over, takes a look at Jack's rifle, goes to his car and gets his to show Jack.
2006 - School goes into lockdown, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.
+++++++++++++++++++
Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.
1963 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends. Nobody goes to jail, nobody arrested, nobody expelled.
2006 - Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.
++++++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +
Scenario: Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.
1963 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by Principal. Sits still in class.
2006 - Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.
++++++++++++ +++++++++ +++++
Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his father's car and his Dad gives him a whipping.
1963 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2006 - Billy's Dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. Billy's sister is told by state psychologist that she remembers being abused herself and their Dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.
++++++++++++ +++++++++ ++++++++
Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some headache medicine to school.
1963 - Mark shares headache medicine with Principal out on the smoking dock.
2006 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.
++++++++++++ +++++++++ ++++
Scenario: Mary turns up pregnant.
1963 - 5 High School Boys leave town. Mary does her senior year at a special school for expectant mothers.
2006 - Middle School Counselor calls Planned Parenthood, who notifies the ACLU. Mary is driven to the next state over and gets an abortion without her parent's consent or knowledge. Mary given condoms and told to be more careful next time.
++++++++++++ +++++++++ +++++
Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.
1963: Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
2006: Pedro's cause is taken up by state democratic party. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he can't speak English.
++++++++++++ +++++++++
Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.
1963 - Ants die.
2006 - BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.
++++++++++++ +++++++++
Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary, hugs him to comfort him.
1963 - In a short time Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2006 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison.
=================
ANYONE SEE A PROBLEM HERE ?????????????
_________________ A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way. |
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Dimitri Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005 Posts: 5919
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Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2006 9:33 pm Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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Ah this one is making its rounds on the net recently
Its funny for me because I wasnt alive back then. Probably not as funny to the people who saw with their own 2 eyes the change.
Dimitri
_________________ A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow. |
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Vince Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005 Posts: 15477 Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
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Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 6:41 am Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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1895ss wrote: |
ANYONE SEE A PROBLEM HERE ????????????? |
Problem....PROBLEM....oh yeah, there is a problem here alright!!!!!
The problem lies with the "bleeding heart, tree hugging, do gooder, minority groups (most of who are single or have same sex partners)" that are trying to justify their existence by ensuring that their beliefs are shoved down the throats of everyone else. They are nothing more than oxygen thieves...a waste of space and rations!!! Because they are part iof a minority group, and they make a lot of noise in the right place at the right time, they are listened to by politicians that want votes. As we all know...it is the squeaky wheel that gets the grease!!!
I am extremely opposed, some would say violently opposed, to these "bleeding heart" morons going into schools and telling the students that they have rights....most of which don't allow their parents, or any other authority figure to chastise them or pull them into line before they go off the tracks completely.
Damn, I gotta get off this soapbox...I'm getting bloody cranky!!
Vince
_________________ Cheers, Vince 
Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done) |
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Bushmaster Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005 Posts: 11317 Location: Ava, Missouri
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Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 8:13 am Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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Liberal, Bleeding Heart Democrates. Like Vince I was grown by 1963, but saw the change with great anger. I took many a trip to the woodshed with my dad when I was growing up and I used a belt on my own 5 kids. Funny...They all came out normal and they still love me and send me the grandchildren.
_________________ I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...
DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote... |
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Dimitri Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005 Posts: 5919
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Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 9:04 am Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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Nothing wrong with alittle copral punishment.
Dimitri
_________________ A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow. |
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brabus Rookie Member


Joined: Oct 03, 2006 Posts: 23
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Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 12:43 pm Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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I wasn't alive back then either, but growing up in the 80s-90s even...my dad would get me good if I screwed up. I turned out just fine. It drives me crazy seeing people with screaming kids in public and all they do is just calmly ask their 4 yr old if they wouldn't mind being quiet. Yeah, a 4 yr old is going to do that. Belts were made for a reason other than holding pants up!
Last edited by brabus on Mon Dec 04, 2006 12:57 pm; edited 2 times in total |
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Dimitri Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005 Posts: 5919
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Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 12:48 pm Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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brabus wrote: |
Belts were made for a reason other than holding pants up! |
That is true!
Dimitri
_________________ A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow. |
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Bushmaster Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005 Posts: 11317 Location: Ava, Missouri
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Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 12:50 pm Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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And god put all that paddin' back there for a reason besides sittin' on it...
_________________ I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...
DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote... |
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tracker Super Member


Joined: Nov 08, 2006 Posts: 1175 Location: Manitoba, Canada
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Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 1:26 pm Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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Interestinger and interestinger,
I was 5 in '63, my dad died a year later. My Mom had a strap you could hone a straight razor on, most times all she had to do was show it to me. Most times (ouch!) Both of my boys got their backsides warmed a time or two and last week my son came home to get Dad's help in raising his daughter.hmmmm....
I wholeheartedly agree with Vince's assessment (which I'm sure suprises the hell out of everyone  ) There's a limited supply of oxygen in this world and some folks are just a waste of said oxygen.
_________________ "If God hadn't meant for man to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat!" |
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1895ss Super Member


Joined: Jul 21, 2005 Posts: 2612 Location: Not Here...!!
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Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 3:54 pm Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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Yep I agree with the paddling you speak of. My sibblings and I got our share when we were growing up and so did my kids. We all grew up just fine knowing right from wrong and with respect for others and their poroperty.
Some people are just a waste of skin.
_________________ A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way. |
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Vince Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005 Posts: 15477 Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
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Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 7:54 am Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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Both my parents "tanned" my butt when it was necessary....which unfortunately was all too often......but I learnt...eventually....to do the right thing. I have grown up okay, in fact I'm a Justice of The Peace and assist the Police with juveniles, so it didn't do me any harm.
My kids learnt the value of the strap or a well placed hand delivered with the appropriate amount of force, until those aforementioned morons got into them at school. That was pretty much the end of my authority.
Kids are all grown up now, well the youngest was 17 yesterday, and the two oldest are always asking questions on how to bring up their kids. Must be some value to a little "contact counselling".
Cheers, Vince
_________________ Cheers, Vince 
Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done) |
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Dimitri Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005 Posts: 5919
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Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 4:33 pm Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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Tell your youngest happy brithday in that case Vince.
Dimitri
_________________ A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow. |
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Sandamer Rookie Member


Joined: Nov 23, 2006 Posts: 3 Location: Burns, WY
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Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 4:50 pm Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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Well, I am new to this site, but this is a topic I am familiar with. I was born in the early 70's and lost my father at an early age. So my Mom was the "enforcer" and we all learned at an early age do no mess with the enforcer. I hate the fact that kids today think if thier parent give them a small attitude adjustment they should call the cops. I tried that once as a kid, the line "if you hit me I'll call the cops" came out of my mouth. My mother put a phone down in front of me and said " call an ambulance too, it will be a few minutes before the cops can get here".
That is something i will never forget, and i think i turned out ok. I consider myself a decent contributing member of society. But when tree huggers run society you can see what we get.
_________________ If at first you don't succeed, that pretty much does it for skydiving |
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Dimitri Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005 Posts: 5919
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Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 4:54 pm Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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Welcome to the forums Sandamer
Dimitri
_________________ A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow. |
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Dimitri Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005 Posts: 5919
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Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 6:38 pm Post subject: Re: "THEN and NOW" |
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By the way its still legal to give Corporal Punishment to your kids in Canada:
Quote:: |
Such debates, however, do not always lead to the banning of domestic corporal punishment and The Supreme Court of Canada recently reaffirmed the right of a parent or guardian to use corporal punishment on children between the ages of two and twelve; this decision was contentious, being based upon S.43 of the Canadian Criminal Code, a provision enacted in 1892) |
Not clear on Australia though I think its legal from that paragraph but they seem to have it under "reveiw" which could mean anything from them tossing it to the side and not spending time on the issue to activily taking sides on that debate  :
Quote:: |
The Australian state of Tasmania also is continuing to review the state's laws on the matter, and may seek to ban the use of corporal punishment by parents. The matter is also under review in other Australian states. |
Also legal in the US still:
Quote:: |
Similarly, despite some opposition to corporal punishment in the USA, spanking children is legal, with some states explicitly allowing it in their law, and a few states even allowing its use by schools. All forms of corporal punishment have been legalized in Massachusetts via a court decision, though a ban has been proposed. |
So spank your kids its still ok for now!
Dimitri
_________________ A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow. |
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