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You might be a gun nut if ....
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Dimitri
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5910

PostPosted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 2:32 pm    Post subject: You might be a gun nut if .... Reply with quote

You Might Be a Gun Nut If...

...you ever seriously thought about dabbing on a little Hoppe's #9
before going out on a date.

...you buy some checkering tools, you checker all your gun stocks, and
then start on the bedposts.

...you cannot recall how many firearms you own.

...you buy a gun that's just like that other gun you have except the
barrel is 1/2" shorter (or longer).

...you buy a gun at a shop only to find out you used to own it a
couple of years ago.

...you know 12 different names for one caliber of cartridge.

...you ever clean a gun that hasn't been shot in the week since you
cleaned it last.

...you consider naming your unborn child Winchester or Remington.

...you purchased two Glocks and two Sigs just to see which brand was
better.

...your drive to work is filled with reverie about why Ed's Red
actually works.

...you strip all the paint off our car and refinish it with cold blue.

...you ever bought ammo in a caliber for which you have no gun,
because you thought some day you MIGHT get a gun in that caliber.

...your collection of American Rifleman back issues, Gun Digests and
reloading manuals cost you a premium the last time you moved.

...you have more than one gun that "kills on both ends."

...you buy high capacity magazines for a gun you have not bought yet.

...you take your guns out of the safe each night and handle them, just
so you can wipe them off before putting them away.

...your mother-in-law asks what new gun junk you want for Christmas
this year.

...you see TV footage of the war in Bosnia and wish you were there to
pick up the brass.

...you drive 300 miles just to ogle (and fire) HK-MP5s (and Stens,
Uzis, BMGs and whatever else shows up at Knob Creek).

...you keep a loaded gun hidden in every room in the house, including
the bathroom and kitchen, "just in case," and then keep one on you at
all times just in case someone breaks in while you're in the hallway.

...you consider it unpatriotic not to own at least one .45 and one
.22.

...you named your pocket pistol "Little Guy" and your 12 gauge "Big
Jake."

...you own reloading dies for calibers that you do not shoot.

...you tape American Shooter so you can pause, reverse and fast
forward to do a complete analysis of the show.

...you understand Smith & Wesson's model numbers.

...you ever bought two brands of the same weight and type of bullet,
just to see if one "shot better."

...you keep a collection of different cartridges at your place of work
as a "conversation piece."

...you take your wife on vacation to a gun show for your 10th
Anniversary and she is as excited to go as you are.

...you ever had to explain, "It's NOT the same gun, it's a variation!"

...you and your new father-in-law go to a gun show on your wedding
day.

...you have life memberships in more than one shooting organization.

...you read that "Brady II" would outlaw possession of more than 1,000
rounds of ammunition and think, "I have more than that rolling around
loose in the trunk of my car!"

...watching The Lion King gives you the itch for a .470 Nitro Express.

... while watching the movie Terminator 2, you have to leave the room
in tears and mournful sobs after Arnold Schwartzenneger throws the
CAR-16 off the moving tractor trailer and it goes bouncing away.

...you go to three different gun shows within a month and you're
excited every single time.

...your guns are cleaner than your residence.

...you have 5 different guns being DROS'd at 3 different FFL dealers.

...you plunked down a $130 deposit on a Seecamp after waiting two
years for them to accept your order, and are still willing to wait
another two years for them to make your pistol.

...your mom gives you a new Springfield Armory .308 sniper rifle for
Christmas.

...four local gun shops know you by name.

...you have your own BATF agent (mounted any suitable way).

...you're friends with 90% of the employee's at all the local gun
shops.

...you identify the gun on the cover of Dillons Blue Press before you
even notice the girl.

...when you stop in at the local gun shop, they ask you questions
like: "How was work?" "How are the wife and kids?" "We're gonna order
some food, ya want in?" etc.

...you have more gunpowder stashed in your home than your local
sporting goods store has on hand.

...you can wallpaper your house with old issues of Shotgun News, Gun
List, Guns & Ammo, etc.

...all of your children are life members of the NRA.

...your children are named "Ogive" and "Meplat."

...if you make $30 per hour at work, but spend 30 minutes on your
knees at the range looking for that last piece of .40 S&W brass.

...you have Brownells on speed dial.

...you trimmed down 100 10mm cases to form .357 Sig brass before
commercial supplies of this brass were available.

Shocked

Dimitri

_________________
A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow.
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roklok
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Aug 11, 2005
Posts: 608
Location: Fairbanks, Alaska

PostPosted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 3:26 pm    Post subject: Re: You might be a gun nut if .... Reply with quote

I can identify with some of these !
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sniper
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Aug 18, 2005
Posts: 735
Location: Utah

PostPosted: Thu Jul 20, 2006 5:31 pm    Post subject: Re: You might be a gun nut if .... Reply with quote

Dimitri wrote:
You Might Be a Gun Nut If...

..you cannot recall how many firearms you own.

...you ever bought two brands of the same weight and type of bullet,
just to see if one "shot better."

...your guns are cleaner than your residence.

...you have your own BATF agent (mounted any suitable way).

...you have Brownells on speed dial.

Dimitri

...And your point is? Very Happy
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Crackshot
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Oct 23, 2005
Posts: 1693
Location: Mich

PostPosted: Fri Jul 21, 2006 7:34 am    Post subject: Re: You might be a gun nut if .... Reply with quote

OH MY GOSH! It all applies to ME. :):)

_________________
The human mind is the weapon, the gun is just one of its tools.
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Logan
Rookie Member
Rookie Member


Joined: Aug 06, 2006
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Sun Aug 06, 2006 9:34 pm    Post subject: Re: You might be a gun nut if .... Reply with quote

I might be a young guy, but I'm on my way.
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yotebuster
Member
Member


Joined: Oct 16, 2005
Posts: 216
Location: Georgia

PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 4:23 am    Post subject: Re: You might be a gun nut if .... Reply with quote

And your point is?? LOL
Guilty.
YB Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

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May all your Bloodtrails be Vertical!
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ogre
Member
Member


Joined: Jan 15, 2006
Posts: 79
Location: Melbourne

PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 6:47 am    Post subject: Re: You might be a gun nut if .... Reply with quote

how can you be patriotic when you governemt confiscates your 45 and your 22's

but other than that most of it referes to me.

alter
P
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