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Vince Site Admin
Joined: May 25, 2005 Posts: 15704 Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 8:29 am Post subject: Soldier Assistance |
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Finding a woman sobbing that she had locked her keys in her car, a passing soldier assures her that he can help.
She looks on amazed as he removes his trousers, rolls them into a tight ball and rubs them against the car door.
Magically it opens.
"That's so clever," the woman gasps. "How did you do it?"
"Easy," replies the man. "These are my khakis".
Cheers, Vince
_________________ Cheers, Vince
Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done) |
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Ghost Member
Joined: Nov 20, 2011 Posts: 25 Location: European Forrest
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 9:40 am Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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English Mike Super Member
Joined: Jan 08, 2007 Posts: 1709 Location: Whitehaven, Cumbria, UK
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TRBLSHTR Super Member
Joined: Mar 23, 2007 Posts: 1071 Location: Lower 48's-left coast(near portlandia)
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lesterg3 Super Member
Joined: Nov 30, 2008 Posts: 1328 Location: Dixie
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 11:53 am Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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That is seriously bad!!
_________________ "A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson
The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson
"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison
"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.
NRA Life Member
Vietnam War Vet 68-69 |
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Ominivision1 Super Member
Joined: Sep 20, 2010 Posts: 2984 Location: Iowa
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 12:31 pm Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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_________________ Regards
Limitations are but boundaries created inside our minds. |
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Elvis Super Member
Joined: Jul 27, 2008 Posts: 9239 Location: south island New Zealand
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 12:44 pm Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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gee Vince where ever do you get these from????
_________________ You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers! |
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Aloysius Super Member
Joined: Nov 03, 2009 Posts: 2438 Location: B., Belgium
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 12:53 pm Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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had to keep my head far to the left so that everything flew together befor I could understand this one...
always been told that English had less words than French, but when Vince stays inventing new words, they will catch up.
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Elvis Super Member
Joined: Jul 27, 2008 Posts: 9239 Location: south island New Zealand
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 1:19 pm Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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no new words in there bud. khaki is the colour of most of our uniforms.
as for the english language it is the most mongrelised of them all there are words and bastardisations of most other languages included in our everyday speech.
_________________ You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers! |
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inthedark Super Member
Joined: Jan 31, 2011 Posts: 913 Location: Ontario
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redneckhunter Member
Joined: Oct 25, 2005 Posts: 83 Location: east texas ,lake of the pines
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 8:00 pm Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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Vince Site Admin
Joined: May 25, 2005 Posts: 15704 Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 9:34 pm Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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_________________ Cheers, Vince
Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done) |
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Elvis Super Member
Joined: Jul 27, 2008 Posts: 9239 Location: south island New Zealand
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 11:26 pm Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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guilty as charged.
_________________ You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers! |
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inthedark Super Member
Joined: Jan 31, 2011 Posts: 913 Location: Ontario
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Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2011 11:47 pm Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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Best Old Guy joke of the year:
I pointed to two old drunks sitting across the bar from us and told my friend "That's us in 10 years".
He said,
"That's a mirror, dip-shit!
_________________ Chimo
Ron
War is sweet to those who have no experience of it, but the experienced man trembles exceedingly at heart on its approach - Pindar 518-438 BC
Be Copy now of Men of Grosser Blood and TEACH THEM HOW TO WAR |
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Vince Site Admin
Joined: May 25, 2005 Posts: 15704 Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
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Posted: Thu Dec 08, 2011 12:18 am Post subject: Re: Soldier Assistance |
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_________________ Cheers, Vince
Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done) |
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