HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: IPutMoInYoA
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 13131

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 181
BOT: 3
Total: 184
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Forums
02: Your Account
03: Forums
04: Home
05: Forums
06: Home
07: Home
08: Your Account
09: Forums
10: Home
11: Home
12: Home
13: Home
14: Home
15: Home
16: Forums
17: Your Account
18: Forums
19: Forums
20: Home
21: Forums
22: Your Account
23: Forums
24: Home
25: Forums
26: Home
27: Forums
28: Forums
29: Forums
30: Forums
31: Forums
32: Forums
33: Home
34: Your Account
35: Your Account
36: Forums
37: Forums
38: Home
39: Forums
40: Forums
41: Forums
42: Forums
43: Home
44: Your Account
45: Home
46: Home
47: Home
48: Forums
49: Home
50: Home
51: Home
52: Home
53: Forums
54: Home
55: Home
56: Forums
57: Home
58: Photo Albums
59: Home
60: Forums
61: Home
62: Your Account
63: Forums
64: Your Account
65: Your Account
66: Home
67: Home
68: Forums
69: Home
70: Your Account
71: Forums
72: Forums
73: Your Account
74: Home
75: Forums
76: Your Account
77: Forums
78: Forums
79: Forums
80: Your Account
81: Forums
82: Your Account
83: Home
84: Forums
85: Forums
86: Forums
87: Home
88: Home
89: Home
90: Your Account
91: Forums
92: Home
93: Home
94: Photo Albums
95: Your Account
96: Your Account
97: Forums
98: Home
99: Home
100: Forums
101: Forums
102: Home
103: Home
104: Home
105: Home
106: Forums
107: Your Account
108: Home
109: Your Account
110: Forums
111: Forums
112: Forums
113: Forums
114: Home
115: Forums
116: Photo Albums
117: Forums
118: Forums
119: Forums
120: Forums
121: Forums
122: Home
123: Forums
124: Home
125: Forums
126: Forums
127: Your Account
128: Your Account
129: Home
130: Forums
131: Forums
132: Forums
133: Photo Albums
134: Forums
135: Forums
136: Your Account
137: Forums
138: Your Account
139: Your Account
140: Your Account
141: Your Account
142: News
143: Forums
144: Home
145: Home
146: Forums
147: Forums
148: Your Account
149: Home
150: Forums
151: Forums
152: Your Account
153: Forums
154: Home
155: Home
156: Photo Albums
157: Home
158: Forums
159: Forums
160: Forums
161: Home
162: Your Account
163: Home
164: Home
165: Photo Albums
166: Home
167: Forums
168: Forums
169: Home
170: Home
171: Your Account
172: Forums
173: Forums
174: Home
175: Forums
176: Home
177: Your Account
178: Home
179: Your Account
180: Forums
181: Forums
  BOT:
01: Home
02: Home
03: News

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 308
 Pictures: 2452
  · Views: 824587
  · Votes: 1316
  · Comments: 86
 

Cowboy-vs-Government
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
glockman55
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Dec 12, 2005
Posts: 831
Location: Michigan

PostPosted: Tue Jan 09, 2007 11:24 am    Post subject: Cowboy-vs-Government Reply with quote

A Montana cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"
The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the cowboy.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give my back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

You're a Congressman for the U .S. Government", says the cowboy.

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows...this is a herd of sheep. Now give me back my dog.

_________________
Are you boys gonna pull them pistols or whistle dixie?
Back to top
View user's profile Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
1895ss
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2612
Location: Not Here...!!

PostPosted: Tue Jan 09, 2007 11:37 am    Post subject: Re: Cowboy-vs-Government Reply with quote

Good one Glock, there's quit a few politicians out there like that ...... ROFL ROFL ROFL

_________________
A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way.
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11393
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Tue Jan 09, 2007 11:49 am    Post subject: Re: Cowboy-vs-Government Reply with quote

S#+t... ROFL ROFL ROFL Cheers

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
tracker
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 08, 2006
Posts: 1175
Location: Manitoba, Canada

PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2007 10:56 am    Post subject: Re: Cowboy-vs-Government Reply with quote

ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL Haha Haha Haha ROFL ROFL

_________________
"If God hadn't meant for man to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat!"
Back to top
View user's profile
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT - 7 Hours



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by *Dizfunkshunal* :.