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Better Gun Fighter.
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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RePete
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Aug 15, 2005
Posts: 1035
Location: Gods Country

PostPosted: Thu Mar 03, 2011 7:40 am    Post subject: Better Gun Fighter. Reply with quote

GUN FIGHTING TIPS

A Cowboy sitting in a saloon one Saturday night, he recognized an elderly man standing at the bar who, in his day, had the reputation of being the fastest gun in the West.

The young cowboy took a place next to the old-timer, bought him a drink and told him the story of his great
ambition.

“Do you think you could give me some tips?” he asked.

The old man looked him up and down and said, “Well, for one thing, you’re wearing your gun too high. Tie the holster a little lower down on your leg.”

“Will that make me a better gunfighter?” asked the young man.

“Sure will,” replied the old-timer.

The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his 44 and shot the bow tie off the piano player.

“That’s terrific!” said the hot shot. “Got any more tips for me?”

“Yep,” said the old man. “Cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer hits it. That’ll give you a smoother draw”.

“Will that make me a better gunfighter?” asked the younger man.

“You bet it will, “ said the old-timer.

The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun in a blur, and then shot a cuff-link off the piano player.

“Wow!” exclaimed the cowboy “I”m learnin’ somethin’ here.

Got any more tips?”

The old man pointed to a large can in a corner.

“See that axle grease over there? Coat your gun with it.”

The young man went over to the can and smeared some of the grease on the barrel of his gun.

“No,” said the old-timer, “I mean smear it all over the gun, handle and all.”

“Will that make me a better gunfighter?” asked the young man.

“No,” said the old-timer, “but when Wyatt Earp gets done playing the piano, he’s gonna shove that gun up your ass, and it won’t hurt near as much.”

_________________
Proud member of the WTFDTSG Club.

Stercus Accidit = Sh*t Happens in Latin.

Nice try = You Suck spelled different.

My parents spanked me as a child. As a result, I now suffer from a psychological condition known as RESPECT FOR OTHERS.
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Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11390
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Thu Mar 03, 2011 9:24 am    Post subject: Re: Better Gun Fighter. Reply with quote

OWCHHH!!

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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