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Perks of being over 60
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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1895ss
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Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2592

PostPosted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 8:30 pm    Post subject: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

PERKS OF BEING OVER 60

If you are not over 60, this is what you have to look forward to.


1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.

4. People call at 9 PM and ask, " Did I wake you ???? "

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

7. Things you buy now won't wear out.

8. You can eat dinner at 4 PM.

9. You can probably live without sex but not without your glasses.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You no longer think of speed limits as challenge.

12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

13. You sing along with elevator music.

14. Your eyes won't get much worse.

15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

18 Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

19. You can't remember who sent you this list......

Shocked Shocked Shocked Laughing Laughing Laughing
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 10864
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 10:51 pm    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

Hey ya mate....how are you?

Whats this OVER 60 bit.....damn, I'm like that now and I'm not quite 55 yet. Very Happy Laughing

Cheers, Vince

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Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

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PaulS
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Joined: Feb 18, 2006
Posts: 2547
Location: South-Eastern Washington - the State

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 12:54 am    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

I'm 56 and it sounds a lot like me too......

what was it we were talkin' about? oh! Fishin' yep I'm gonna try this new place - if I can find it again.

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Bushmaster
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 9228
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 5:49 am    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

Old? How old am I? Oh yeah...I remember...54...Yeah...That's it...

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DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
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keetoowah
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Joined: Mar 20, 2007
Posts: 691
Location: Deep in the mountains of Montana

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 10:15 am    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

thanks for a good checklist to have when I get closer to that decade

Very Happy

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wy111
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Joined: Jun 02, 2005
Posts: 114
Location: N. Yorkshire, U.K. ( Pomgolia)

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 1:30 pm    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

Will you youngun's stop bickering.
Another good thing is, that the recoil does't rattle your teeth any more, because you forgot they are still in the glass of water at home!!!!

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moose2
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Joined: Mar 19, 2005
Posts: 677
Location: North Idaho

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 3:53 pm    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

Guess its gonna happen someday. -- tr

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1895ss
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Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2592

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 4:42 pm    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

PaulS you and I are the same age and I know what you mean........... Very Happy
Bushy your memory is failing you, you're 64. See there's that over 60 thing....... Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy
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vint2
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Joined: Nov 18, 2005
Posts: 1216
Location: Iowa

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 5:47 pm    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

Hey, guys, I am closer to 70 and I can still remember ma telling me "You would forget your head if it was not fastened on" when I was in my teens!! I think.......

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Dimitri
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Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5865
Location: Southern Ontario

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 6:04 pm    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

41 years to go and counting. Laughing

Dimitri

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fireball 3
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Joined: Jan 28, 2007
Posts: 393
Location: northern calif

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 7:02 pm    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

nothin' wrong with dirt, it's everywhere. almost there myself. 1.5 yrs to go. alright! Laughing Dave

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if at first you don't succeed, take a nap, and try
tomorrow. can't hurt!
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keetoowah
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Joined: Mar 20, 2007
Posts: 691
Location: Deep in the mountains of Montana

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 8:41 pm    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

PaulS the new fishing place would be new everytime.

regards

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keetoowah
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Joined: Mar 20, 2007
Posts: 691
Location: Deep in the mountains of Montana

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 8:43 pm    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

added bonus for the 60+ group .... you can hide your own Easter Eggs.

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Bushmaster
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 9228
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 6:19 am    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

Here is a very bad manored question, but I'm good for them...

keetoowah...Do women give up their age?

What the heck...Everyone else is curious too. I'm at that age where I don't mind the consiquences and ask...

64?? Did I forget again 1895ss? He's older then me, he should know. Very Happy Besides...I thought you went to work. What happened? Here we said our "good-bys" and you're still here... Confused

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I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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keetoowah
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Joined: Mar 20, 2007
Posts: 691
Location: Deep in the mountains of Montana

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 1:17 pm    Post subject: Re: Perks of being over 60 Reply with quote

Bushmaster

Old enough for Tracker to be interestd, & young enough to keep him chasing Very Happy

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