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Amendments to the NJ Drivers Handbook
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15718
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri Dec 08, 2006 6:51 am    Post subject: Amendments to the NJ Drivers Handbook Reply with quote

Jersey Motorist's Handbook
New Regulations in the New Jersey Division of Motor Vehicle's 2006 Handbook:

1. Turn signals will give away your next move. A confident New Jersey Driver avoids using them.

2. Under no circumstance should you maintain a safe distance between you and the car in front of you, because the space will be filled in by somebody else, putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

3. The faster you drive through a red light, the less chance you have of getting hit.

4. WARNING! Never come to a complete stop at a stop sign. No one expects it and it will result in your being rear-ended.

5. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive bodywork, especially with PA, NY or DE plates. With no insurance, the other operator probably has nothing to lose.

6. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to ensure that your ABS kicks in, giving a vigorous, foot massage as the brake pedal violently pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to strengthen your leg muscles.

7. Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to prepare other drivers entering the highway.

8. Speed limits are arbitrary figures; given only as a suggestion and are not enforceable in New Jersey during rush hour.

9 Just because you're in the left lane and have no room to speed up or move over doesn't mean that a New York driver flashing his high beams behind you doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.

10. Always brake and rubberneck when you see an accident or even someone changing a tire. This is seen as a sign of respect for the victim.

11. Learn to swerve abruptly without signaling. New Jersey is the home of high-speed slalom-driving thanks to the Department of Transportation, which puts potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them alert.

12. It is tradition in New Jersey to honk your horn at cars in front of you that do not move three milliseconds after the light turns green.

13. To avoid injury in the event of a collision or rollover, it is important to exit your vehicle thru the windshield right away. Wearing your seat belt will only impede your hi-velocity escape from danger.

14. Remember that the goal of every New Jersey driver is to get ahead of the pack by whatever means necessary.

15. In New Jersey, 'flipping the bird' is considered a polite salute. This gesture should always be returned.


Thank You,
The New Jersey Division of Motor Vehicles



Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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TXCountryboy
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Member


Joined: Dec 14, 2006
Posts: 30
Location: Texas

PostPosted: Sun Dec 17, 2006 3:10 pm    Post subject: Re: Amendments to the NJ Drivers Handbook Reply with quote

Hey Vince,
I lived up north for a while and several of these are "honest-to-God" absolutely true. The following points apply to most of the northeast though, not just NJ:

#1, 2, 7, and 9

Great post - are you Australian or just an ex-pat?
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15718
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 9:26 pm    Post subject: Re: Amendments to the NJ Drivers Handbook Reply with quote

TXCountryboy wrote:
Hey Vince,
IGreat post - are you Australian or just an ex-pat?

Gidday mate....I'm a true blue, fair dinkum Aussie....and a good lookin' rooster to boot. Very Happy Laughing :lol: Laughing

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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