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Newspaper headlines in the year 2029
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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515034s10ring
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Sep 08, 2005
Posts: 1153
Location: Working my way back up and around

PostPosted: Fri Mar 31, 2006 5:54 pm    Post subject: Newspaper headlines in the year 2029 Reply with quote

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh
largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.

Minorities still trying to have English recognized as
Mexifornia's third language.

Baby conceived naturally - - scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least
10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported
legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and
reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight
loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter
speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil
rights.

Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines, (democratic officials still trying to rig in their favor).

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Why no......I'm really not an outdoorsmsn at all. But i did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night!
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peepsight
Rookie Member
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Joined: Jan 08, 2006
Posts: 16

PostPosted: Fri Mar 31, 2006 8:27 pm    Post subject: Re: Newspaper headlines in the year 2029 Reply with quote

lol that would be a damn fast camera......
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Dimitri
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5906

PostPosted: Fri Mar 31, 2006 8:41 pm    Post subject: Re: Newspaper headlines in the year 2029 Reply with quote

Peepsight so true ROFL Cheers

Dimitri

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A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow.
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1895ss
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2613
Location: Not Here...!!

PostPosted: Sat Apr 01, 2006 12:25 am    Post subject: Re: Newspaper headlines in the year 2029 Reply with quote

The scary part is that some or most could become fact.......... Shocked

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A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way.
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