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Never Ever Believe an Irishman
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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pete4d
Super Member
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Joined: Nov 27, 2011
Posts: 597
Location: Dixie , Alabama , & Louisiana

PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 10:02 pm    Post subject: Never Ever Believe an Irishman Reply with quote

Never Ever Believe an Irishman
An Irishman was drinking in a bar in London when he gets a call on his phone.

He orders drinks for everybody in the bar as he announces his wife has
just produced a typical Irish baby boy weighing 25 pounds.

Nobody can believe that any new baby can weigh in at 25 pounds, but the man just shrugs, "That's about average up our way, folks... like I said, my boy's a typical County Clare baby boy."

Two weeks later the man returns to the bar.

The bartender says, "Say, aren't you the father of that typical Irish baby that weighed 25 pounds at birth? Everybody's been making' bets about how big he'd be in two weeks .... so how much does he weigh now?"

The proud father answers, "Seventeen pounds."

The bartender is puzzled and concerned. "What happened? You said he
was 25 pounds the day he was born."

The father takes a slow swig of his Jameson Irish Whisky, wipes his lips on his shirt sleeve, leans into the bartender and proudly says, "Had him circumcised."

_________________
"march to the sound of the guns and shoot everyone not dressed like you"--D I 1968

When the SHTF I'm gonna hunker down until all those idiots kill each other.

I'm on the watch list are you ?
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7810
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Fri Jan 18, 2019 5:44 pm    Post subject: Re: Never Ever Believe an Irishman Reply with quote

only did the operation as needed a new fan belt for his truck.......

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You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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Tremblay
Super Member
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Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 1915
Location: Malta, Montana

PostPosted: Sat Jan 19, 2019 10:39 am    Post subject: Re: Never Ever Believe an Irishman Reply with quote

Elvis wrote:
only did the operation as needed a new fan belt for his truck.......

Haha ROFL

_________________
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. - Mark
Twain

Never argue with a stupid person ,cause they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. Mark Twwain
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slimjim
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Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 7858
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2019 6:47 am    Post subject: Re: Never Ever Believe an Irishman Reply with quote

Elvis wrote:
only did the operation as needed a new fan belt for his truck.......

ouch! That has to leave a mental scar!

_________________
"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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pete4d
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Joined: Nov 27, 2011
Posts: 597
Location: Dixie , Alabama , & Louisiana

PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2019 10:24 am    Post subject: Re: Never Ever Believe an Irishman Reply with quote

slimjim wrote:
Elvis wrote:
only did the operation as needed a new fan belt for his truck.......

ouch! That has to leave a mental scar!

Only if it's cut a little bit short Cheers Cheers

_________________
"march to the sound of the guns and shoot everyone not dressed like you"--D I 1968

When the SHTF I'm gonna hunker down until all those idiots kill each other.

I'm on the watch list are you ?
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