HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: hongwei28
New Today: 1
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 12625

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 303
BOT: 1
Total: 304
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Forums
02: Your Account
03: Forums
04: Forums
05: Home
06: Forums
07: Forums
08: Forums
09: Forums
10: Forums
11: Forums
12: Forums
13: Photo Albums
14: Forums
15: Your Account
16: Forums
17: Forums
18: Forums
19: Forums
20: Forums
21: Forums
22: Forums
23: Photo Albums
24: Forums
25: Photo Albums
26: Forums
27: Forums
28: Forums
29: Forums
30: Forums
31: Forums
32: Forums
33: Forums
34: Forums
35: Forums
36: Forums
37: Your Account
38: Your Account
39: Forums
40: Forums
41: Forums
42: Forums
43: Your Account
44: Forums
45: Forums
46: Forums
47: Forums
48: Forums
49: Photo Albums
50: Forums
51: Forums
52: Forums
53: Forums
54: Forums
55: Forums
56: Forums
57: Your Account
58: Forums
59: Forums
60: Forums
61: Forums
62: Forums
63: Your Account
64: Forums
65: Forums
66: Forums
67: Forums
68: Your Account
69: Forums
70: Forums
71: Your Account
72: Forums
73: Forums
74: Forums
75: Forums
76: Forums
77: Your Account
78: Forums
79: Forums
80: Forums
81: Forums
82: Your Account
83: Forums
84: Forums
85: Forums
86: Forums
87: Forums
88: Forums
89: Forums
90: Forums
91: Forums
92: Forums
93: Forums
94: Forums
95: Forums
96: Forums
97: Your Account
98: Your Account
99: Your Account
100: Forums
101: Forums
102: Forums
103: Forums
104: Home
105: Forums
106: Forums
107: News
108: Forums
109: Forums
110: Forums
111: Forums
112: Forums
113: Photo Albums
114: Photo Albums
115: Forums
116: Forums
117: Your Account
118: Your Account
119: Forums
120: Forums
121: Forums
122: Forums
123: Your Account
124: Your Account
125: Forums
126: Forums
127: Your Account
128: Photo Albums
129: Forums
130: Forums
131: Forums
132: Forums
133: Forums
134: Forums
135: Forums
136: Forums
137: Forums
138: Your Account
139: News
140: Forums
141: Forums
142: Forums
143: Forums
144: Your Account
145: Forums
146: Your Account
147: Forums
148: Photo Albums
149: Forums
150: Forums
151: Photo Albums
152: Forums
153: Your Account
154: Forums
155: Forums
156: Forums
157: Forums
158: Forums
159: Forums
160: Forums
161: Forums
162: Forums
163: Your Account
164: Forums
165: Forums
166: Forums
167: Home
168: Your Account
169: Forums
170: Forums
171: Forums
172: Forums
173: Forums
174: Forums
175: Forums
176: Forums
177: Forums
178: Forums
179: Forums
180: Forums
181: Forums
182: Forums
183: Forums
184: Forums
185: Forums
186: Forums
187: Your Account
188: Forums
189: Forums
190: Forums
191: Forums
192: Forums
193: Forums
194: Forums
195: Forums
196: Forums
197: Forums
198: Forums
199: Forums
200: Forums
201: Forums
202: Your Account
203: Your Account
204: Forums
205: Forums
206: Forums
207: Forums
208: Forums
209: Forums
210: Your Account
211: Forums
212: Forums
213: Forums
214: Forums
215: Forums
216: Forums
217: Forums
218: Forums
219: Forums
220: Forums
221: Forums
222: Forums
223: Forums
224: Forums
225: Forums
226: Forums
227: Forums
228: Forums
229: Forums
230: Forums
231: Forums
232: Forums
233: Forums
234: Forums
235: Forums
236: Forums
237: Forums
238: Forums
239: Your Account
240: Forums
241: Forums
242: Forums
243: Forums
244: Your Account
245: Forums
246: Forums
247: Forums
248: Forums
249: Forums
250: Forums
251: Forums
252: Forums
253: Forums
254: Forums
255: Photo Albums
256: Forums
257: Forums
258: Forums
259: Forums
260: Forums
261: Forums
262: Forums
263: Forums
264: Forums
265: Forums
266: Forums
267: Forums
268: Forums
269: Forums
270: Forums
271: Forums
272: Forums
273: Forums
274: Your Account
275: Your Account
276: Forums
277: Forums
278: Forums
279: Forums
280: Forums
281: Forums
282: Forums
283: Forums
284: Forums
285: Forums
286: Your Account
287: Forums
288: Forums
289: Forums
290: Forums
291: Forums
292: Forums
293: Photo Albums
294: Forums
295: Your Account
296: Forums
297: Forums
298: Forums
299: Forums
300: Forums
301: Photo Albums
302: Forums
303: Your Account
  BOT:
01: Forums

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 305
 Pictures: 2362
  · Views: 452674
  · Votes: 1310
  · Comments: 86
 

Support our Advertisers

Thanksgiving 2022 (potentially not funny)
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
dhc4ever
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2360
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2011 1:46 pm    Post subject: Thanksgiving 2022 (potentially not funny) Reply with quote

THANKSGIVING 2022


Winston, come into the dining room, it's time to eat," Julia yelled to her
husband. "In a minute, honey, it's a tie score," he answered.

Actually Winston wasn't very interested in the traditional holiday football
game between Detroit and Washington . Ever since the government passed the
Civility in Sports Statute of 2017, outlawing tackle football for its
"unseemly violence" and the "bad example it sets for the rest of the world",
Winston was far less of a football fan than he used to be. Two-hand touch
wasn't nearly as exciting.

Yet it wasn't the game that Winston was uninterested in. It was more the
thought of eating another Tofu Turkey . Even though it was the best type of
VeggieMeat available after the government revised the American Anti-Obesity
Act of 2018, adding fowl to the list of federally-forbidden foods, (which
already included potatoes, cranberry sauce, and mincemeat pie), it wasn't
anything like real turkey.

And ever since the government officially changed the name of "Thanksgiving
Day" to "A National Day of Atonement" in 2020, to officially acknowledge the
Pilgrims' historically brutal treatment of Native Americans, the holiday had
lost a lot of its luster.

Eating in the dining room was also a bit daunting. The unearthly gleam of
government-mandated fluorescent light bulbs made the Tofu Turkey look even
weirder than it actually was, and the room was always cold. Ever since
Congress passed the Power Conservation Act of 2016, mandating all
thermostats - which were monitored and controlled by the electric company -
be kept at 68 degrees, every room on the north side of the house was barely
tolerable throughout the entire winter.

Still, it was good getting together with family. Or at least most of the
family.

Winston missed his mother, who passed on in October, when she had used up
her legal allotment of life-saving medical treatment. He had had many heated
conversations with the Regional Health Consortium, spawned when the private
insurance market finally went bankrupt, and everyone was forced into the
government health care program.

And though he demanded she be kept on her treatment, it was a futile effort.
"The RHC's resources are limited," explained the government bureaucrat
Winston spoke with on the phone. "Your mother received all the benefits to
which she was entitled. I'm sorry for your loss."

Ed couldn't make it either. He had forgotten to plug in his electric car
last night, the only kind available after the Anti-Fossil Fuel Bill of 2021
outlawed the use of the combustion engines - for everyone but government
officials. The fifty mile round trip was about ten miles too far, and Ed
didn't want to spend a frosty night on the road somewhere between here and
there.

Thankfully, Winston's brother, John, and his wife were flying in.

Winston made sure that the dining room chairs had extra cushions for the
occasion. No one complained more than John about the pain of sitting down so
soon after the government-mandated cavity searches at airports, which
severely aggravated his hemorrhoids. Ever since a terrorist successfully
smuggled a cavity bomb onto a jetliner, the TSA told Americans the added
"inconvenience" was an "absolute necessity" in order to stay "one step ahead
of the terrorists."

Winston's own body had grown accustomed to such probing ever since the
government expanded their scope to just about anywhere a crowd gathered, via
Anti-Profiling Act of 2022. That law made it a crime to single out any group
or individual for "unequal scrutiny," even when probable cause was involved.
Thus, cavity searches at malls, train stations, bus depots, etc., etc., had
become almost routine. Almost.

The Supreme Court is reviewing the statute, but most Americans expect a
Court composed of four progressives and five conservatives to leave the law
intact. "A living Constitution is extremely flexible", said the Court's
eldest member, Elena Kagan. " Europe has had laws like this one for years.
We should learn from their example," she added.

Winston's thoughts turned to his own children. He got along fairly well with
his 12-year-old daughter, Brittany, mostly because she ignored him. Winston
had long ago surrendered to the idea that she could text anyone at any time,
even during Atonement Dinner. Their only real confrontation had occurred
when he limited her to 50,000 texts a month, explaining that was all he
could afford. She whined for a week, but got over it.

His 16-year-old son, Jason, was another matter altogether. Perhaps it was
the constant bombarding he got in public school that global warming, the
bird flu, terrorism, or any of a number of other calamities were "just
around the corner", but Jason had developed a kind of nihilistic attitude
that ranged between simmering surliness and outright hostility. It didn't
help that Jason had reported his father to the police for smoking a
cigarette in the house, an act made criminal by the Smoking Control Statute
of 2018, which outlawed smoking anywhere within 500 feet of another human
being. Winston paid the $5,000 fine, which might have been considered
excessive before the American dollar became virtually worthless as a result
of QE13.

The latest round of quantitative easing the federal government initiated
was, once again, to "spur economic growth." This time, they promised to push
unemployment below its years-long rate of 18%, but Winston was not
particularly hopeful.

Yet the family had a lot for which to be thankful, Winston thought, before
remembering it was a Day of Atonement.

At least, he had his memories. He felt a twinge of sadness when he realized
his children would never know what life was like in the Good Old Days, long
before government promises to make life "fair for everyone" realized their
full potential. Winston, like so many of his fellow Americans, never
realized how much things could change when they didn't happen all at once,
but little by little, so people could drink their tea and get used to them.
He wondered what might have happened if the public had stood up while there
was still time, maybe back around 2011, when all the real nonsense began.

"Maybe we wouldn't be where we are today if we'd just said 'enough is
enough' when we had the chance," he thought.

Maybe so, Winston. Maybe so.

_________________
Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
Back to top
View user's profile
Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7543
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 12:09 am    Post subject: Re: Thanksgiving 2022 (potentially not funny) Reply with quote

hmmm yes.
where will we be at that time I do wonder???

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
Back to top
View user's profile
Ominivision1
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Sep 20, 2010
Posts: 2984
Location: Iowa

PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 11:33 am    Post subject: Re: Thanksgiving 2022 (potentially not funny) Reply with quote

Makes you wonder anymore with big brother telling you what you can and can't do nowdays and its getting worst.

_________________
Regards

Limitations are but boundaries created inside our minds.
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT - 7 Hours



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Advertisements
 


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by Dizfunkshunal :.