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Friendship
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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slimjim
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 8314
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Mon May 16, 2011 6:53 pm    Post subject: Friendship Reply with quote

Friendship among Women:
A woman didn't come home and told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends.
None of them knew anything about it.

Friendship among Men:
A man didn't come home and told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends.
Eight confirmed he had slept over and two said he was still there.

_________________
"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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Suzanne
Super Member
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Joined: Jun 27, 2009
Posts: 3323
Location: Eugene, Oregon

PostPosted: Mon May 16, 2011 9:36 pm    Post subject: Re: Friendship Reply with quote

Ok Ok I know this is fish bait but I'm gonna have'ta bite. I'll be the fish again.

If you only have friends that will lie for you, what good are they. They're always lieing!!

Another point, If your wifey told you she stayed over at a friend's house, wouldn't you ask her who she stayed with?

I know it's a joke, but it reminds me of a TV sit-com where the husband is a blithering idiot and the wife is the wise ole sage. Or the opposite, the husband is the wise one and the wife is a stupid blonde. Yup there are couples like that......on TV.

Don't you want a really stupid person to spend your life with? Or maybe a blind, stupid, but good lookin one? What does a person really want? Man's best friend, a dog. But let's think about this a little further....If you had a stupid mate, and a great dog, who you gonna sleep with? The one that does what you want, or the one that doesn't do what you want. The one that spends your money like it was 223 ammo, or the one that is always happy and never lies? The one that marks the yard as it's territory, or the one that burns the green beans. The one that leaves slobber marks all over the car windows, or the one that has a terrible disposition once a month. The one that can't seem to clean the bathroom, or the one that drinks from the toilet. The one that washes dishes with a tongue or the one that refuses to wash dishes at all. The one that smells like a new perm every day, or the one that rolls in fresh manure after a bath. The one that jump up on you with muddy feet, or the one that wipes greasy hands on your pants. (I know it depends where)

Ok I think I've summed it up for you. One is as bad as the other, just depends what is tolerable as the days go by, turning to years gone by, and then the offspring and the little messes they create, and old age, and the little messes that creates. People live longer than dogs, you can always find another one to fill the void. Starting all over with the training and raking up the dog doooo and cleaning the car windows and the training and the walkies and the training and the dog doooo and the walkies and the barking and the neighbors and the friends coming over and get someone to baby sit while you go on vacation to Europe with your super spouse that's made millions in taxidermy and so proud of you for the supply of wild exotic game animals to mount. Forgot where I was, I have to get a life...

With strained
devotion
or is it stained
Suz

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May the sun keep you dancing,
And the stars shed light on your dreams.
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 9253
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2011 1:08 am    Post subject: Re: Friendship Reply with quote

why oh why didnt they call each other to say goodnight and pass on messages of love n devotion like all good spouses should???then there wouldnt be any questions or did the late great man from Menphis have it right when he sung " we cant go on together with suspicious minds". I always make a point to check in with SWMBO if Im out for the night away on hunting trip etc. but maybe Im just a romantic old softy.

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Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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stovepipe
Super Member
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Joined: Sep 25, 2008
Posts: 4877
Location: Pine, Az.

PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2011 9:04 am    Post subject: Re: Friendship Reply with quote

Suz- Laughing ....awesome as usual. Very Happy

My ol' lady don't come home and I don't know where she was? I aint callin' no one and that's the end of that. She' either dead or cheating. Either way- aint gettin' back in my bed and I'm movin' on.

P/s: I'll take the dog, they never COMPLAIN. Razz
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Ominivision1
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Sep 20, 2010
Posts: 2984
Location: Iowa

PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2011 9:40 am    Post subject: Re: Friendship Reply with quote

Reminds me of an old saying my aunt told me when I was younger.

Women are like ... soap operas
They're fun to watch, but don't believe everything you hear.

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Limitations are but boundaries created inside our minds.
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PaulS
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Feb 18, 2006
Posts: 4330
Location: South-Eastern Washington - the State

PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2011 9:14 pm    Post subject: Re: Friendship Reply with quote

If my wife told me she slept over at her friends house I would say, "OK." and that would be the end of it but she would have told me what she was doing and where she was going and who she was going to be with long before it ever happened. I would do the same and she would react pretty much the same too.
Then again, we still like to be with each other.......... more than anywhere else.

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Paul
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slimjim
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 8314
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Wed May 18, 2011 5:02 am    Post subject: Re: Friendship Reply with quote

wow, a joke turned serious. I fell short on that one. I also learned something new.

SWMBO - She Who Must Be Obeyed

_________________
"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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ROADJOCKY
Member
Member


Joined: Jan 29, 2010
Posts: 101
Location: SOUTHERN-OHIO

PostPosted: Wed May 18, 2011 1:40 pm    Post subject: Re: Friendship Reply with quote

Suzanne wrote:
Ok Ok I know this is fish bait but I'm gonna have'ta bite. I'll be the fish again.

If you only have friends that will lie for you, what good are they. They're always lieing!!

Another point, If your wifey told you she stayed over at a friend's house, wouldn't you ask her who she stayed with?

I know it's a joke, but it reminds me of a TV sit-com where the husband is a blithering idiot and the wife is the wise ole sage. Or the opposite, the husband is the wise one and the wife is a stupid blonde. Yup there are couples like that......on TV.

Don't you want a really stupid person to spend your life with? Or maybe a blind, stupid, but good lookin one? What does a person really want? Man's best friend, a dog. But let's think about this a little further....If you had a stupid mate, and a great dog, who you gonna sleep with? The one that does what you want, or the one that doesn't do what you want. The one that spends your money like it was 223 ammo, or the one that is always happy and never lies? The one that marks the yard as it's territory, or the one that burns the green beans. The one that leaves slobber marks all over the car windows, or the one that has a terrible disposition once a month. The one that can't seem to clean the bathroom, or the one that drinks from the toilet. The one that washes dishes with a tongue or the one that refuses to wash dishes at all. The one that smells like a new perm every day, or the one that rolls in fresh manure after a bath. The one that jump up on you with muddy feet, or the one that wipes greasy hands on your pants. (I know it depends where)

Ok I think I've summed it up for you. One is as bad as the other, just depends what is tolerable as the days go by, turning to years gone by, and then the offspring and the little messes they create, and old age, and the little messes that creates. People live longer than dogs, you can always find another one to fill the void. Starting all over with the training and raking up the dog doooo and cleaning the car windows and the training and the walkies and the training and the dog doooo and the walkies and the barking and the neighbors and the friends coming over and get someone to baby sit while you go on vacation to Europe with your super spouse that's made millions in taxidermy and so proud of you for the supply of wild exotic game animals to mount. Forgot where I was, I have to get a life...

With strained
devotion
or is it stained
Suz
Suz Suz Suz,you are the best!!! Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Shocked
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