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Vince Site Admin
Joined: May 25, 2005 Posts: 15701 Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
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Posted: Tue May 16, 2006 9:17 pm Post subject: IDIOTS |
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IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD:
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road.
The reason:
"Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."
From Kingman, KS.
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IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
He was a Chef?
Yep...From Kansas City!
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IDIOT SIGHTING:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked:
"Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge? To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?"
He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask." Happened in Birmingham, Ala.
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IDIOT SIGHTING:
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when its safe to cross the
street.
I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!"
She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS
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IDIOT SIGHTING:
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker.
She was leaving the company due to "downsizing."
Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often."
Not another word was spoken.
We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.
This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.
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IDIOT SIGHTING:
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her own life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office no less.
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IDIOT SIGHTING:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
"Hey," I announced to the technician, "its open!"
His reply, "I know - I already got that side."
This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, Mississippi!
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STAY ALERT!
They walk among us ... and they REPRODUCE
Cheers, Vince
_________________ Cheers, Vince
Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done) |
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sniper Super Member
Joined: Aug 18, 2005 Posts: 735 Location: Utah
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yotebuster Member
Joined: Oct 16, 2005 Posts: 216 Location: Georgia
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Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 2:57 pm Post subject: Re: IDIOTS |
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IDIOTS IN THE BANK
Like the blonde woman that walked into the bank to purchase some Travelers Checks. The teller said no problem, what denomination do you want?
The blonde woman paused for a moment, then said, "Chrisitian!"
Name withheld to protect the guilty.
LOL
YB
_________________ May all your Bloodtrails be Vertical! |
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Bushmaster Super Member
Joined: Jun 12, 2005 Posts: 11389 Location: Ava, Missouri
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Crackshot Super Member
Joined: Oct 23, 2005 Posts: 1693 Location: Mich
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Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 4:00 pm Post subject: Re: IDIOTS |
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I'm married to a red head, Makes life Deadly!...........have two red headed Daughters as well.
_________________ The human mind is the weapon, the gun is just one of its tools. |
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Bushmaster Super Member
Joined: Jun 12, 2005 Posts: 11389 Location: Ava, Missouri
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Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 4:08 pm Post subject: Re: IDIOTS |
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My brother had two daughters. He hated it and ran as fast as he could to the local tavern when all three were pmsing.
_________________ I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...
DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote... |
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Dimitri Super Member
Joined: Nov 25, 2005 Posts: 5944
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Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 4:10 pm Post subject: Re: IDIOTS |
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Idoits are all over Kinda scary isnt it ??
Sometimes I wonder how they get through school and college.
Dimitri
_________________ A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow. |
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Bushmaster Super Member
Joined: Jun 12, 2005 Posts: 11389 Location: Ava, Missouri
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Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 4:16 pm Post subject: Re: IDIOTS |
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Anybody can get through higher education. Dimitri. Some of them even start college with a smiggen of common sense, but seem to loose it by graduation.
_________________ I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...
DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote... |
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Dimitri Super Member
Joined: Nov 25, 2005 Posts: 5944
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Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 4:19 pm Post subject: Re: IDIOTS |
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Bushmaster,
Atleast I wont be one of them
Dimitri
_________________ A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow. |
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Bushmaster Super Member
Joined: Jun 12, 2005 Posts: 11389 Location: Ava, Missouri
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Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 4:22 pm Post subject: Re: IDIOTS |
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I hope not. Mind you. I have nothing against higher education. I think it's great if you can. I have one.
_________________ I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...
DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote... |
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Vince Site Admin
Joined: May 25, 2005 Posts: 15701 Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
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Posted: Thu May 18, 2006 6:34 pm Post subject: Re: IDIOTS |
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Bushmaster wrote: |
My brother had two daughters. He hated it and ran as fast as he could to the local tavern when all three were pmsing. |
Mate I have FOUR daughters ....and of course them and the missus synchronised (don't know how they do that ). I'd crawl a mile over broken glass to get away when they started !!
Cheers, Vince
_________________ Cheers, Vince
Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done) |
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