HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: CGSEAL
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 12393

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 187
BOT: 4
Total: 191
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Forums
02: Forums
03: Forums
04: Forums
05: Forums
06: Photo Albums
07: Forums
08: Forums
09: Forums
10: Forums
11: Forums
12: Forums
13: Forums
14: Forums
15: Forums
16: Forums
17: Forums
18: Forums
19: Forums
20: Forums
21: Forums
22: Forums
23: Forums
24: Home
25: Forums
26: Forums
27: Photo Albums
28: Photo Albums
29: Forums
30: Forums
31: Forums
32: Forums
33: Forums
34: Forums
35: Forums
36: Forums
37: Forums
38: Forums
39: Photo Albums
40: Your Account
41: Photo Albums
42: Forums
43: Forums
44: Forums
45: Forums
46: Forums
47: Forums
48: Forums
49: Forums
50: Forums
51: Forums
52: Forums
53: Forums
54: Forums
55: Forums
56: Forums
57: Forums
58: Forums
59: Forums
60: Forums
61: Forums
62: Forums
63: Forums
64: Forums
65: Forums
66: Forums
67: Forums
68: Forums
69: Forums
70: Forums
71: Forums
72: Forums
73: Forums
74: Forums
75: Photo Albums
76: Forums
77: Photo Albums
78: Photo Albums
79: Forums
80: Photo Albums
81: Forums
82: Photo Albums
83: Forums
84: Forums
85: Photo Albums
86: Photo Albums
87: Photo Albums
88: Photo Albums
89: Forums
90: Forums
91: Forums
92: Forums
93: Forums
94: Photo Albums
95: Forums
96: Forums
97: Forums
98: Forums
99: Forums
100: Photo Albums
101: Forums
102: Photo Albums
103: Forums
104: Forums
105: Forums
106: Home
107: Your Account
108: Forums
109: Forums
110: Forums
111: Forums
112: Forums
113: Forums
114: Photo Albums
115: Your Account
116: Forums
117: Forums
118: Photo Albums
119: Forums
120: Forums
121: Photo Albums
122: Photo Albums
123: Photo Albums
124: Forums
125: Forums
126: Forums
127: Forums
128: Forums
129: Forums
130: Photo Albums
131: Forums
132: Forums
133: Forums
134: Photo Albums
135: Forums
136: Forums
137: Photo Albums
138: Forums
139: Forums
140: Forums
141: Forums
142: Your Account
143: Photo Albums
144: Forums
145: Forums
146: Forums
147: Forums
148: Forums
149: Forums
150: Forums
151: Forums
152: Photo Albums
153: Photo Albums
154: Forums
155: Forums
156: Forums
157: Forums
158: Forums
159: Forums
160: Forums
161: Photo Albums
162: Forums
163: Your Account
164: Forums
165: Photo Albums
166: Photo Albums
167: Photo Albums
168: Photo Albums
169: Forums
170: Forums
171: Statistics
172: Forums
173: Forums
174: Forums
175: Forums
176: Forums
177: Forums
178: Forums
179: Forums
180: Forums
181: Forums
182: Forums
183: Forums
184: Photo Albums
185: Forums
186: Forums
187: Forums
  BOT:
01: Forums
02: Statistics
03: Forums
04: Photo Albums

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 312
 Pictures: 2417
  · Views: 263393
  · Votes: 1283
  · Comments: 86
 

Support our Advertisers

An unfortunate sign of the times.
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 12852
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Feb 11, 2017 2:34 am    Post subject: An unfortunate sign of the times. Reply with quote

The Lone Ranger was arrested in Lone Pine, California today for the crime of illegally transferring silver bullets. The famed masked man had just apprehended an armed felon after shooting the gun out of his hand. As was his practice for the last eighty years, he gave a silver bullet to the outlaw’s victim.

She was a kindly old widow who was robbed and held captive by the desperado. This lady, grateful that her life and property were restored, treasured the silver bullet as a symbol that justice was done.

The trouble started when she showed the bullet to her weekly garden club. Upon seeing the gleaming memento, one lady fainted. Another lady gasped that they were all going to die. A third lady, who was also a member of CHA (California Hysterics Anonymous), warned that where there was a bullet there had to be a gun. During the shocked silence an attendee desperately summoned the Sheriff on her cell phone.

When the Sheriff heard their story he struggled to stifle a laugh. He knew the old gentleman on the big white horse. He also appreciated how many criminals the Lone Ranger had captured over the years. However, since California voters passed Proposition 63, he had to uphold the law.

Predictably, he found the masked man enjoying a Near Beer at the Dry Gulch Saloon back in town.

“Thanks for helping old widow Smith,” he said, “but did you really give her a silver bullet?”

“Yes,” replied the Lone Ranger, “after all that’s my trademark. Got a problem with that?”

“Well, yes,” hesitated the sheriff. “Ya see . . . under Proposition 63, you’ve got to be a licensed firearms dealer to give anyone a bullet.”

“Are you kidding?” asked the Lone Ranger.

“Wish I was,” said the embarrassed sheriff, “and to boot whoever receives the bullet has to be registered with the Department of Justice.”

“Holy guacamole!” exclaimed the masked man. “Did I do anything else wrong?”

“Well,” said the sheriff, looking even more sheepish now, “there’s the little matter of you shooting a gun out of the outlaw’s hand.”

“What!” said the Lone Ranger. “If I hadn’t done that, the skunk would have plugged me for sure.”

“I know that,” admitted the Sheriff, “but he’ll probably sue you for failing to retreat and using unnecessary force. If they convict you, they’ll take your six-shooters away for good. Which reminds me, according to California law, your pistols have too large a capacity. If I were you, I’d convert those six-shooters into five-shooters as quick as you can.”

“Jumpin’ Junipers!” exclaimed the Lone Ranger. “I’d better tell this to my faithful Indian companion, Tonto.”

“Hold on,” said the Sheriff. “I need to remind you that Indians are now referred to as Native Americans. We privileged male palefaces have got to remember that.”

As the Lone Ranger sat in shocked silence, the sheriff explained his rights and proceeded to take him in.

Postscript:

Upon being provided an attorney at state expense, the outlaw successfully sued the Lone Ranger. He claimed that he could no longer work since he had suffered the permanent loss of his trigger finger. Lt. Governor Gavin Newsom urged imposing the maximum sentence for possession of illegal ammunition and a firearm that exceeds lawful capacity. He received a huge monetary award, forcing the Lone Ranger to sell the silver mine.

Tonto was deemed innocent but victimized by virtue of being a member of an oppressed minority. He was given land by the state and now operates a very profitable casino.

After getting out of jail, the Lone Ranger could not find a job since he was now an ex-con. Fortunately, Tonto lets him do light janitorial work at the casino and sleep in the basement.

Following the passage of Proposition 63, violent crime in California has steadily increased. Lt. Governor Newsom advises troubled property owners to protect themselves by posting signs that say:

Keep Out—Gun Free Zone

Lawyer on Call

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)

Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger
Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 6780
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Sat Feb 11, 2017 3:01 am    Post subject: Re: An unfortunate sign of the times. Reply with quote

bar humbug......

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
Back to top
View user's profile
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10200
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Sat Feb 11, 2017 10:34 am    Post subject: Re: An unfortunate sign of the times. Reply with quote

Unfortunately most of that is true. Particularly the part about Prop 63.

The USSR of C has gone to hell in a hand basket.

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
gelandangan
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5659
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Sat Feb 11, 2017 4:43 pm    Post subject: Re: An unfortunate sign of the times. Reply with quote

Yes, unfortunately this is getting real.
The left movement is getting out of control.

Sad..

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website
slimjim
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 6868
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Sat Feb 11, 2017 6:14 pm    Post subject: Re: An unfortunate sign of the times. Reply with quote

gelandangan wrote:
he left movement is getting out of control ..... Sad.

+1 and unable to deal with things not being their way. Their tantrums are amazing to watch.

_________________
"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
Back to top
View user's profile
lesterg3
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 30, 2008
Posts: 1235
Location: Dixie

PostPosted: Sun Feb 12, 2017 7:56 am    Post subject: Re: An unfortunate sign of the times. Reply with quote

Sad, but mostly true. Time to seriously thin the herd. I have some suggestions on where to start.

_________________
"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

NRA Life Member
Vietnam War Vet 68-69
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail Photo Gallery
Grey_Wolf
Member
Member


Joined: Aug 06, 2015
Posts: 105

PostPosted: Sun Feb 12, 2017 4:54 pm    Post subject: Re: An unfortunate sign of the times. Reply with quote

slimjim wrote:
gelandangan wrote:
he left movement is getting out of control ..... Sad.

+1 and unable to deal with things not being their way. Their tantrums are amazing to watch.


Isn't that what Hillary and gang were accusing Trump's supporters of? Before the election happened and they were demanding that Trump state that he would abide by "the decision of the people" and now the shoe is on the other foot.....
Back to top
View user's profile
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT - 7 Hours



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Advertisements
 


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by Dizfunkshunal :.