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Mums bibleJokes, funny stories and general humor
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dhc4ever Super Member
Joined: May 26, 2011 Posts: 2944 Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia
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Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2012 6:11 pm Post subject: Mums bible |
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Four brothers left home for college, and they became successful doctors and lawyers.
One evening, they chatted after having dinner together. They discussed the 95th birthday gifts they were able to give their elderly mother who moved to Florida .
The first said, "You know I had a big house built for Mum."
The second said, "And I had a large theater built in the house."
The third said, "And I had my Mercedes dealer deliver an SL600 to her."
The fourth said, "You know how Mum loved reading the Bible and you know she can't read anymore because she can't see very well. I met this preacher who told me about a parrot who could recite the entire Bible. It took 10 preachers almost 8 years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $50,000 a year for 5 years to the church, but it was worth it. Mum only has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot will recite it."
The other brothers were impressed. After the celebration Mum sent out her "Thank You" notes.
She wrote: Milton, the house you built is so huge that I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house. Thanks anyway."
"Marvin, I am too old to travel. I stay home; I have my groceries delivered, so I never use the Mercedes. The thought was good. Thanks."
"Michael, you gave me an expensive theatre with Dolby sound and it can hold 50 people, but all of my friends are dead, I've lost my hearing, and I'm nearly blind. I'll never use it. Thank you for the gesture just the same."
"Dearest Melvin, you were the only son to have the good sense to give a little thought to your gift. The chicken was delicious Thank you so much."
Love, mum.
_________________ Pete
Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics.............. |
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gelandangan Super Member
Joined: May 07, 2006 Posts: 6400 Location: Sydney Australia
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Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2012 6:56 pm Post subject: Re: Mums bible |
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LOL!!
_________________ A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.
Do - Not try!
gelandangan.weebly.com/ |
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Donut Slayer Super Member
Joined: Jun 27, 2007 Posts: 594 Location: Pensacola, Florida
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Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2012 7:17 pm Post subject: Re: Mums bible |
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_________________ Browning X-Bolt in 30'06. The work for a pet load starts again. The more people I meet, the more I like my dog. |
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Elvis Super Member
Joined: Jul 27, 2008 Posts: 9261 Location: south island New Zealand
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Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2012 11:10 pm Post subject: Re: Mums bible |
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oh dear... how to break the news to the clergy???
_________________ You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers! |
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Vince Site Admin
Joined: May 25, 2005 Posts: 15725 Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
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Posted: Thu Jul 26, 2012 3:58 am Post subject: Re: Mums bible |
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_________________ Cheers, Vince
Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done) |
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