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Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck?
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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glockman55
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Dec 12, 2005
Posts: 831
Location: Michigan

PostPosted: Sat Apr 12, 2008 7:01 am    Post subject: Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck? Reply with quote

Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck?

Here is a little test that will help you decide.

The answer can be found by posing the following question:


#You're walking down a
deserted street with your wife
and
two small children.


Suddenly, an Islamic
Terrorist with a huge knife
comes
around the corner, locks eyes with you,
screams obscenities, praises
Allah, raises the
knife, and charges at you.


You are carrying a
Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.


You have mere seconds
before he reaches you and your family. What
do
you do?


............................................................




THINK CAREFULLY AND
THEN SCROLL DOWN:










Democrat's
Answer :


Well, that's not enou gh information to answer the question!
Does
the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that
would inspire
him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife
think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club
and knock
the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about
this situation?
Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind
of message
does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be
happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would
he be
content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold
on, could my
family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call
9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have
paint and weed day and
make this happier, healthier street that
would
discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to
debate this with
some friends for few days and try to come to a
consensus.


................................................................................................................




Republican's
Answer:



BANG!



...............................................................................................................




Redneck's Answer:


BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG !
Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG!
BANG! Click
Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those
the
Winchester
Silver Tips or Hollow Points?! '
Son: 'Can I shoot the next
one?!'
Wife: 'You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!

_________________
Are you boys gonna pull them pistols or whistle dixie?
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Pumpkinslinger
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Sep 22, 2007
Posts: 4411
Location: NC foothills

PostPosted: Sat Apr 12, 2008 7:55 am    Post subject: Re: Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck? Reply with quote

LOL! I knew the answer to this question before I ever read it! Now pass me another magazine...

_________________
Mike

"I ain't no better than anyone else, and there ain't no one better than me!" Ma Kettle

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Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10328
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:49 pm    Post subject: Re: Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck? Reply with quote

I wouldn't hang around for too long after shooting him...He might be rigged to explode...I'm somewhere between "Republican" and "Redneck"...I would fired until "lock back" reloaded and waited to see if he needs more Or has friends...

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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