Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister

User Info

Welcome Anonymous

Latest: biggamehunter1967
New Today: 1
New Yesterday: 1
Overall: 12520

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 74
BOT: 4
Total: 78
Who Is Where:
01: Your Account
02: Forums
03: Forums
04: Your Account
05: Your Account
06: Your Account
07: Your Account
08: Forums
09: Your Account
10: Your Account
11: Home
12: Forums
13: Your Account
14: Forums
15: Your Account
16: Forums
17: Your Account
18: Home
19: Your Account
20: Forums
21: Your Account
22: Your Account
23: Forums
24: News
25: Forums
26: Your Account
27: Your Account
28: Forums
29: Your Account
30: Your Account
31: Your Account
32: Your Account
33: Forums
34: Forums
35: Your Account
36: Forums
37: Your Account
38: Forums
39: Your Account
40: Forums
41: Forums
42: Your Account
43: Photo Albums
44: Forums
45: Forums
46: Forums
47: Forums
48: Forums
49: Forums
50: Home
51: Your Account
52: Forums
53: Forums
54: Your Account
55: Forums
56: Your Account
57: Forums
58: Your Account
59: Forums
60: Forums
61: Your Account
62: Your Account
63: Your Account
64: Forums
65: Your Account
66: Forums
67: Your Account
68: Forums
69: Forums
70: Your Account
71: Forums
72: Your Account
73: Forums
74: Your Account
01: Forums
02: Forums
03: Forums
04: Forums

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 304
 Pictures: 2343
  · Views: 313856
  · Votes: 1302
  · Comments: 85

Support our Advertisers

Bean Counters
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Super Member
Super Member

Joined: Jul 15, 2005
Posts: 1040
Location: Destin, Florida

PostPosted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 9:42 am    Post subject: Bean Counters Reply with quote

If the bean counters ever get you down, a little knowledge that they haunt the halls of the mundane and the mighty.

Whilst marching from Portugal to a position which commands the approach to Madrid and the French forces, my officers have been diligently complying with your requests, which have been sent by H.M. ship from London to Lisbon and thence by dispatch rider to our headquarters.
We have enumerated our saddles, bridles, tents and tent poles, and all manner of sundry items for which His Majesty’ Government holds me accountable. I have dispatched reports on the character, wit, and spleen of every officer. Each item and every farthing have been accounted for, with two regrettable exceptions for which I beg your indulgence.
Unfortunately, the sum of one shilling and ninepence remains unaccounted for in one infantry battalion’s petty cash and there has been hideous confusion as to the number of jars of raspberry jam issued to one cavalry regiment during a sandstorm in western Spain. This reprehensible carelessness may be related to the pressure of circumstances, since we are at war with France, a fact which may come as a bit of a surprise to you gentlemen at Whitehall.
This brings me to my present purpose, which is to request elucidation of my instruction from His Majesty’s Government, so that I may better understand why I am dragging an army over these barren plains. I construe that perforce it must be one of two alternative duties, as given below. I shall pursue either one with my best ability, but I cannot do both.
1. To train an army of uniformed British clerks in Spain for the benefit of the accountants and copy-boys in London, or, perchance
2. To see to it that the forces of Napoleon are driven out of Spain.

Your most obedient servant,


The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery.
-Winston Churchill
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
Super Member
Super Member

Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10348
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 10:49 am    Post subject: Re: Bean Counters Reply with quote

everyone has his or her problems...

I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT - 7 Hours

Jump to:  

You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by Dizfunkshunal :.