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statues
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
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Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Mon Aug 22, 2016 1:20 am    Post subject: statues Reply with quote

Two statues in a park, one of a nude man, one of a nude woman. They had been facing each other across a pathway for a hundred years, when one day an angel comes down from the sky and with a single gesture brings the two to life.
The angel tells them; “As a reward for being so patient through a hundred blazing summers and dismal winters, you have been given life for thirty minutes to do what you’ve wished to do the most”
He looks at her, she looks at him, and they go running behind the shrubbery.
The angel waits patiently as the bushes rustle and giggling ensues. After fifteen minutes, the two return out of breath and laughing.
The angel tells them: “Um, you have fifteen minutes left, would you care to do it again?”
He asks her, “Shall We?” She eagerly replies: “Oh, yes, let’s! But let’s change positions, this time, I’ll hold the pigeon down, and you poop on its head”

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Bushmaster
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
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PostPosted: Mon Aug 22, 2016 8:07 am    Post subject: Re: statues Reply with quote

You sure you 're not Vince and using Elvis' name to hide your shame?

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Vince
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PostPosted: Mon Aug 22, 2016 9:53 pm    Post subject: Re: statues Reply with quote

Bushmaster wrote:
You sure you 're not Vince and using Elvis' name to hide your shame?

Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha

Good one Elvis...that's a cracker mate

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dhc4ever
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Joined: May 26, 2011
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PostPosted: Tue Aug 23, 2016 1:59 am    Post subject: Re: statues Reply with quote

Who do you think is russling the bushes?

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Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
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Tremblay
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Location: Malta, Montana

PostPosted: Tue Aug 23, 2016 8:12 am    Post subject: Re: statues Reply with quote

dhc4ever wrote:
Who do you think is russling the bushes?

Well it was their first dump so it probably was an earth shaking experience for them

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Vince
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Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Tue Aug 23, 2016 4:54 pm    Post subject: Re: statues Reply with quote

Tremblay wrote:
dhc4ever wrote:
Who do you think is russling the bushes?

Well it was their first dump so it probably was an earth shaking experience for them

A HUGE earth shattering experience mate.






Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha

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Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)


Last edited by Vince on Wed Aug 24, 2016 12:35 am; edited 1 time in total
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Elvis
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PostPosted: Wed Aug 24, 2016 12:24 am    Post subject: Re: statues Reply with quote

Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha

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gelandangan
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5760
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Wed Aug 24, 2016 3:08 pm    Post subject: Re: statues Reply with quote

Haha

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