Scottish Cows

Azar · Member Joined: Jan 04, 2010 Posts: 275 Location: Utah

The only cow in a small town in Ireland stopped giving milk.

The town folk found they could buy a cow in Scotland quite cheaply. They brought the cow from Scotland.

It was wonderful, produced lots of milk every day and everyone was happy.

They bought a bull to mate with the cow to get more cows, so they'd never have to worry about their milk supply again. They put the bull in the pasture with the cow but whenever the bull tried to mount the cow, the cow would move away. No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away from the bull and he was never able to do the deed. The people were very upset and decided to go to the Vet, who was very wise, tell him what was happening and ask his advice.

"Whenever the bull tries to mount our cow, she moves away.
When he approaches her from the front, she backs off.
If he approaches from the back, she moves forward.
If he attempts from the one side, she walks away to the other side.
She just never seems to be in the mood to cooperate."

The Vet rubbed his chin thoughtfully and pondered this before asking,
"Did you by chance get this cow in Scotland?"

The people were dumbfounded, since no one had ever mentioned that they had brought the cow over from Scotland.
"You are truly a wise Vet," they said. "How did you know we got the cow from Scotland?"

The Vet replied with a distant look in his eye:
"My wife is from Scotland..."

Vince · Posted: Thu Jan 08, 2015 2:46 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

Bushmaster · Posted: Thu Jan 08, 2015 9:59 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

Aaah...Now that wasn't nice...

Azar · Member Joined: Jan 04, 2010 Posts: 275 Location: Utah

Eh, I figure I have enough Scottish blood running through my veins that it's not prejudicial. Very Happy

Tremblay · Posted: Thu Jan 08, 2015 10:18 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

I wonder where my ex is from ????

Bushmaster · Posted: Thu Jan 08, 2015 10:26 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

Don't know 'bout your ex, but my ex was of French heritage and she was a cold fish.

Me? Strong Scotch heritage...

Elvis · Posted: Thu Jan 08, 2015 12:53 pm Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

Vince · Posted: Fri Jan 09, 2015 12:11 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

SCOTTISH Bushy, Scottish mate. Scotch is that nectar of the Gods that we like to sip on a cool night. Cheers

Tremblay · Posted: Fri Jan 09, 2015 12:20 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

Yes sir Vince, scoch, water no ice.

dhc4ever · Posted: Fri Jan 09, 2015 1:39 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

Perhaps he had a wee tipple before he answered.....

dhc4ever · Posted: Fri Jan 09, 2015 1:41 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

Perhaps he had a wee tipple before he answered.....

Elvis · Posted: Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:05 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

looks like dhc has too as he is hiccuping already Very Happy

Aloysius · Posted: Fri Jan 09, 2015 4:52 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

Bushy, and you prefer your scotch with ice? So as long as you don't go to the cold Northren countries, in my opinion you made a good choise... Smile

Bushmaster · Posted: Fri Jan 09, 2015 9:34 am Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

I prefer my Scotch neat. I've had too many bad ice cubes over the years.

Aloysius · Posted: Fri Jan 09, 2015 1:16 pm Post subject: Re: Scottish Cows

I understand. When I drink water it will also keep me awake all night... besides it's demineralising you!
Even my dog prefers beer instead of water. So water cannot be good, look what fish do in that stuff... not to mention the Ganges in India...