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Panda Bear
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Azar
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Joined: Jan 04, 2010
Posts: 231
Location: Utah

PostPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2014 4:14 pm    Post subject: Panda Bear Reply with quote

A panda bear walks into a bar and orders a sandwich. The waiter brings him the sandwich. The panda bear eats it, pulls out a pistol, kills the waiter, and gets up and starts to walk out.

The bartender yells for him to stop. The panda bear asks,“What do you want?” The bartender replies, “First you come in here, order food, kill my waiter, then try to go without paying for your food.”

The panda bear turns around and says, “Hey! I’m a Panda. Look it up!” The bartender goes into the back room and looks up panda bear in the encyclopedia, which read:

“Panda: a bear-like marsupial originating in Asian regions. Known largely for it’s stark black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves.”

Very Happy BA-dum-dum!
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gelandangan
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5659
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2014 8:10 pm    Post subject: Re: Panda Bear Reply with quote

Groan!

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A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 12852
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Wed Nov 12, 2014 11:35 pm    Post subject: Re: Panda Bear Reply with quote

More GROANS....but funny nonetheless

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Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)

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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 6779
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2014 1:50 am    Post subject: Re: Panda Bear Reply with quote

K 1 W 1 = eats roots shoots and leaves

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You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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dhc4ever
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Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2214
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2014 2:09 am    Post subject: Re: Panda Bear Reply with quote

Dont forget lying around on bondi beach bludging on tne dole.....

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Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
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slimjim
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Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 6868
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2014 5:45 pm    Post subject: Re: Panda Bear Reply with quote

Azar, you just wiped out my chuckle from the milk bath.

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"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

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Azar
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Joined: Jan 04, 2010
Posts: 231
Location: Utah

PostPosted: Fri Nov 14, 2014 10:33 am    Post subject: Re: Panda Bear Reply with quote

You must have read them in the wrong order then. Wink
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