HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: msmith11950
New Today: 2
New Yesterday: 2
Overall: 12429

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 112
BOT: 5
Total: 117
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Forums
02: Forums
03: Your Account
04: Forums
05: Forums
06: Forums
07: Forums
08: Forums
09: Forums
10: Forums
11: Forums
12: Forums
13: Forums
14: Photo Albums
15: Forums
16: Forums
17: Forums
18: Forums
19: Forums
20: Photo Albums
21: Photo Albums
22: Forums
23: Forums
24: Forums
25: Forums
26: Statistics
27: Forums
28: Forums
29: Photo Albums
30: Photo Albums
31: Forums
32: Forums
33: Forums
34: Forums
35: Forums
36: Forums
37: Forums
38: Forums
39: Forums
40: Forums
41: Forums
42: Forums
43: Forums
44: Forums
45: Forums
46: Forums
47: Forums
48: Forums
49: Forums
50: Photo Albums
51: Forums
52: Forums
53: Forums
54: Forums
55: Forums
56: Photo Albums
57: Forums
58: Forums
59: Forums
60: Forums
61: Forums
62: Forums
63: Your Account
64: Forums
65: Forums
66: Forums
67: Forums
68: Forums
69: Forums
70: Statistics
71: Forums
72: Forums
73: Forums
74: Photo Albums
75: Forums
76: Forums
77: Forums
78: Forums
79: Your Account
80: Forums
81: Forums
82: Forums
83: Forums
84: Forums
85: Forums
86: Forums
87: Photo Albums
88: Photo Albums
89: Forums
90: Photo Albums
91: Forums
92: Forums
93: Forums
94: Forums
95: Forums
96: Forums
97: Forums
98: Forums
99: Forums
100: Forums
101: Forums
102: Forums
103: Forums
104: Forums
105: Forums
106: Photo Albums
107: Forums
108: Forums
109: Forums
110: Forums
111: Forums
112: Forums
  BOT:
01: Forums
02: Home
03: Forums
04: Forums
05: Forums

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 300
 Pictures: 2357
  · Views: 276554
  · Votes: 1295
  · Comments: 86
 

Support our Advertisers

Social History 101
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Dimitri
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5906
Location: Southern Ontario

PostPosted: Tue May 16, 2006 8:17 pm    Post subject: Social History 101 Reply with quote

Origin of liberals and conservatives

Some new thoughts here.....

The division of the human family into its two distinct political branches
occurred some 10,000 years ago, when humans coexisted as members of small
bands of nomadic hunter/gatherers.

The pivotal event of societal evolution was the invention of beer. This
epochal event was both the foundation of modern civilization and
theoccasion of the bifurcation of humanity into its two distinct
subgroups: Liberals and Conservatives.

Once beer was discovered, it required grain, and that was the beginning
of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented
yet, so it was necessary to stick close to the brewery. That's how
villages were formed.

Some men spent their days killing animals to barbecue at night while they
were drinking beer. This was the beginning of the conservative movement.

Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting, learned to live
off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly barbecues and doing
the sewing, fetching and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the
liberal movement. An interesting evolutionary side note: some of these
earlyliberal men eventually evolved into women.

Liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the trade union,
the invention of group therapy and group hugs, and the concept of
democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that the
conservatives provided.

Over the years, conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most
powerful land animal on earth. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass.

Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer
white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their
beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.
Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have
higher testosterone levels than their men.

Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in
Hollywood and group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the
designated hitter rule because it wasn't "fair" to make the pitcher also
bat.

Conservatives drink domestic beer, They eat red meat, and still provide
for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo cowboys,
lumber jacks, construction workers, medical doctors, police officers,
corporate executives, soldiers, athletes, and generally anyone who works
productively outside government. Conservatives who own companies hire
other conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to "govern" the producers
and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are
more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals
remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America. They crept
in after the wild west was tame and created a business of trying to get
MORE for nothing.

Here ends the lesson in world history.

------

Dimitri

_________________
A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow.
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website Photo Gallery
sniper
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Aug 18, 2005
Posts: 735
Location: Utah

PostPosted: Wed May 17, 2006 10:32 am    Post subject: Re: Social History 101 Reply with quote

Dimitri:
And here I thought Canadians weren't politically savvy... Very Happy

"Some liberals evolved into women" ??? Now, there's a concept ! Embarassed How do you tell which ones?
Back to top
View user's profile
Dimitri
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5906
Location: Southern Ontario

PostPosted: Wed May 17, 2006 1:52 pm    Post subject: Re: Social History 101 Reply with quote

Sniper,

Humm thats a tough one. I'd take it as any guy you know that acts like the women you know in your life Laughing

Dimitri

_________________
A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow.
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website Photo Gallery
1895ss
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2613
Location: West of Here!!

PostPosted: Wed May 17, 2006 9:43 pm    Post subject: Re: Social History 101 Reply with quote

And here's another bit of news. Most (90%)of the liberals are from your end of the country.......... not here in the west Confused

_________________
A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way.
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
Dimitri
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5906
Location: Southern Ontario

PostPosted: Thu May 18, 2006 3:29 am    Post subject: Re: Social History 101 Reply with quote

1895,

I know that Sad

Dimitri

_________________
A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow.
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website Photo Gallery
Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 12990
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri May 19, 2006 4:59 am    Post subject: Re: Social History 101 Reply with quote

Laughing Laughing

Brilliant post Dimitri. And I thought History was a boring subject. Especially Political Science.

ROFL ROFL ROFL

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT - 7 Hours



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Advertisements
 


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by Dizfunkshunal :.