HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: PAJohn
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 1
Overall: 12518

People Online:
Members: 1
Visitors: 408
BOT: 2
Total: 411
Who Is Where:
 Members:
01: noupjaf > Home
 Visitors:
01: Photo Albums
02: Photo Albums
03: Photo Albums
04: Photo Albums
05: Photo Albums
06: Photo Albums
07: Photo Albums
08: Photo Albums
09: Forums
10: Forums
11: Photo Albums
12: Photo Albums
13: Photo Albums
14: Photo Albums
15: Forums
16: Photo Albums
17: Photo Albums
18: Photo Albums
19: Photo Albums
20: Photo Albums
21: Photo Albums
22: Photo Albums
23: Photo Albums
24: Photo Albums
25: Photo Albums
26: Photo Albums
27: Photo Albums
28: Photo Albums
29: Photo Albums
30: Photo Albums
31: Photo Albums
32: Photo Albums
33: Forums
34: Photo Albums
35: Photo Albums
36: Photo Albums
37: Forums
38: Photo Albums
39: Photo Albums
40: Home
41: Forums
42: Photo Albums
43: Photo Albums
44: Photo Albums
45: Forums
46: Forums
47: Forums
48: Forums
49: Forums
50: Forums
51: Forums
52: Forums
53: Forums
54: Forums
55: Forums
56: Forums
57: Forums
58: Forums
59: Forums
60: Forums
61: Forums
62: Photo Albums
63: Forums
64: Forums
65: Forums
66: Forums
67: Forums
68: Forums
69: Forums
70: Forums
71: News
72: Forums
73: Forums
74: Forums
75: Forums
76: Forums
77: Forums
78: Forums
79: Your Account
80: Your Account
81: Your Account
82: Your Account
83: Forums
84: Photo Albums
85: Photo Albums
86: Photo Albums
87: Forums
88: Forums
89: Home
90: Treasury
91: Home
92: Home
93: Forums
94: Home
95: Forums
96: Home
97: Home
98: Forums
99: Treasury
100: Forums
101: Photo Albums
102: Photo Albums
103: Forums
104: Forums
105: Forums
106: Forums
107: Forums
108: Forums
109: Photo Albums
110: Forums
111: Photo Albums
112: Forums
113: Photo Albums
114: Photo Albums
115: Photo Albums
116: Forums
117: Photo Albums
118: Photo Albums
119: Photo Albums
120: Photo Albums
121: Photo Albums
122: Forums
123: Photo Albums
124: Photo Albums
125: Forums
126: Forums
127: Photo Albums
128: Statistics
129: Statistics
130: Home
131: Forums
132: Your Account
133: Forums
134: Forums
135: Forums
136: Forums
137: Forums
138: Forums
139: Forums
140: Forums
141: Forums
142: Forums
143: Forums
144: Forums
145: Forums
146: Forums
147: Forums
148: Forums
149: Forums
150: Forums
151: Forums
152: Forums
153: Forums
154: Forums
155: Forums
156: Home
157: Your Account
158: Forums
159: Your Account
160: Photo Albums
161: Photo Albums
162: Photo Albums
163: Photo Albums
164: Photo Albums
165: Photo Albums
166: Photo Albums
167: Photo Albums
168: Forums
169: Your Account
170: Your Account
171: Your Account
172: Your Account
173: Your Account
174: Photo Albums
175: Photo Albums
176: Photo Albums
177: Photo Albums
178: Photo Albums
179: Photo Albums
180: Your Account
181: Your Account
182: Forums
183: Photo Albums
184: Forums
185: Photo Albums
186: Photo Albums
187: Photo Albums
188: Photo Albums
189: Photo Albums
190: Photo Albums
191: Your Account
192: Photo Albums
193: Photo Albums
194: Photo Albums
195: Photo Albums
196: Photo Albums
197: Forums
198: Forums
199: Photo Albums
200: Photo Albums
201: Forums
202: Photo Albums
203: Photo Albums
204: Forums
205: Photo Albums
206: Photo Albums
207: Photo Albums
208: Photo Albums
209: Photo Albums
210: Photo Albums
211: Photo Albums
212: Photo Albums
213: Photo Albums
214: Photo Albums
215: Photo Albums
216: Forums
217: Forums
218: Forums
219: Forums
220: Forums
221: Forums
222: Forums
223: Forums
224: Forums
225: Forums
226: Forums
227: Forums
228: Photo Albums
229: Photo Albums
230: Photo Albums
231: Photo Albums
232: Statistics
233: Photo Albums
234: Your Account
235: Statistics
236: Statistics
237: Your Account
238: Your Account
239: Your Account
240: Your Account
241: Your Account
242: Photo Albums
243: Photo Albums
244: Photo Albums
245: Forums
246: Photo Albums
247: Photo Albums
248: Photo Albums
249: Forums
250: Photo Albums
251: Photo Albums
252: Photo Albums
253: Photo Albums
254: Photo Albums
255: Forums
256: Photo Albums
257: Photo Albums
258: Photo Albums
259: Forums
260: Photo Albums
261: Photo Albums
262: Photo Albums
263: Photo Albums
264: Photo Albums
265: Forums
266: Photo Albums
267: Photo Albums
268: Photo Albums
269: Photo Albums
270: Photo Albums
271: Photo Albums
272: Photo Albums
273: Forums
274: Photo Albums
275: Photo Albums
276: Photo Albums
277: Photo Albums
278: News
279: Forums
280: Forums
281: Photo Albums
282: Photo Albums
283: Photo Albums
284: Photo Albums
285: Photo Albums
286: Photo Albums
287: Your Account
288: Home
289: Home
290: News
291: Home
292: Photo Albums
293: Photo Albums
294: Photo Albums
295: Photo Albums
296: Photo Albums
297: Photo Albums
298: Photo Albums
299: Home
300: Photo Albums
301: Photo Albums
302: Photo Albums
303: Photo Albums
304: Photo Albums
305: Photo Albums
306: Photo Albums
307: Photo Albums
308: Photo Albums
309: Photo Albums
310: Forums
311: Photo Albums
312: Photo Albums
313: Photo Albums
314: Photo Albums
315: Forums
316: Home
317: Forums
318: Photo Albums
319: Forums
320: Photo Albums
321: Photo Albums
322: Photo Albums
323: Photo Albums
324: Photo Albums
325: Photo Albums
326: Photo Albums
327: Photo Albums
328: Your Account
329: Your Account
330: Photo Albums
331: Forums
332: Your Account
333: Your Account
334: Your Account
335: Your Account
336: Your Account
337: Forums
338: Photo Albums
339: Photo Albums
340: Photo Albums
341: Photo Albums
342: Photo Albums
343: Photo Albums
344: Photo Albums
345: Photo Albums
346: Photo Albums
347: Photo Albums
348: Photo Albums
349: Photo Albums
350: Forums
351: Forums
352: Photo Albums
353: Photo Albums
354: Forums
355: Forums
356: Forums
357: Forums
358: Forums
359: Forums
360: Photo Albums
361: Forums
362: Forums
363: Forums
364: Forums
365: Forums
366: Forums
367: Forums
368: Forums
369: Forums
370: Forums
371: Forums
372: Forums
373: Forums
374: Forums
375: Forums
376: Photo Albums
377: Forums
378: Forums
379: Forums
380: Forums
381: Forums
382: Forums
383: Forums
384: Forums
385: Your Account
386: Your Account
387: Your Account
388: Forums
389: Your Account
390: Forums
391: Forums
392: Forums
393: Forums
394: Forums
395: Forums
396: Home
397: Forums
398: Home
399: Forums
400: Forums
401: Forums
402: Forums
403: Forums
404: Forums
405: Forums
406: Forums
407: Forums
408: Forums
  BOT:
01: Forums
02: Home

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 304
 Pictures: 2343
  · Views: 313840
  · Votes: 1302
  · Comments: 85
 

Support our Advertisers

Washing the Cat
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Go to page 1, 2  Next
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13199
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri Jun 29, 2007 5:38 pm    Post subject: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

Following the Dog/Cat Diary, as an ongoing tribute to our friend the cat, I offer the following enjoyable bathing procedure for him.
Very Happy Laughing Very Happy Laughing Very Happy Laughing

1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.

2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and have both lids lifted.

3. Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
Very Happy

4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. (You may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape.)
wtf Mad

CAUTION : Do not get any part of your body too close to the edge, as his paws will be reaching out for any purchase they can find. The cat will self-agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from your toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this. Gentlemen...it is STRONGLY recommended that you DO NOT sit on the lid at this time as "dangly" bits can, and will, become a target for the cat.
Mad Laughing

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "powerwash and rinse" which I have found to be quite effective.
Shocked Shocked Mad

6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.
Very Happy Very Happy

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.
Hiding

8. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry himself.
Evil or Very Mad Evil or Very Mad Laughing ROFL Laughing Haha

Sincerely,
The Dog

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
Verminator2
Member
Member


Joined: Dec 30, 2006
Posts: 26

PostPosted: Fri Jun 29, 2007 6:47 pm    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

Party ROFL ROFL
Back to top
View user's profile
jeh7mmmag
Member
Member


Joined: Dec 24, 2006
Posts: 219
Location: DFW, TX.

PostPosted: Fri Jun 29, 2007 6:59 pm    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

Thanks for a good one. I had seen it before but you really soaped it up good. LOL

Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

_________________
mypva.org/
DAV
VNE USS LEX CVT-16 BLUE GHOST V2 CATS ABE-2
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
Verminator2
Member
Member


Joined: Dec 30, 2006
Posts: 26

PostPosted: Fri Jun 29, 2007 7:04 pm    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

Party ROFL ROFL
Back to top
View user's profile
srslfrank
Rookie Member
Rookie Member


Joined: Jun 10, 2007
Posts: 14

PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 10:18 am    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

You do realize that you don't have to clean the toilet first. The cat will get it quite clean.
Back to top
View user's profile
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10339
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 10:50 am    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

srslfrank. Yup, but Vince tries to not offend the pet lovers and PETA.

Welcome to this fine site...Grab a beer and sit a spell. Join in too. We hunt and fish here and when not doing that, we entertain each other...

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
rdncktink
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Mar 02, 2007
Posts: 476
Location: Hwaseong, South Korea

PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 1:06 pm    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

If the cat's to big to close the lid like mine is toss them in the shower with some soap, close the door (hope you have a glass door), turn on the shower, and plug the drain. By the time the cat reaches the top of the door they'll be nice and clean.

For hamsters place them in their hamster ball. Once they are nicely in there place them on the top rack (since they're small) of the dishwasher in light was non-heated.

_________________
Don't whine how bad your country is until you live in another.
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address Yahoo Messenger
keetoowah
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Mar 20, 2007
Posts: 691
Location: Deep in the mountains of Montana

PostPosted: Tue Jul 03, 2007 8:46 am    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

omg that was toooooo funny.
had a cat that would get in the shower with me. come to think about so does my dog when he was smaller. now have to wash him outside with the horse and llamas.
my lab/wolf mix wont get near water.

_________________
If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?
Back to top
View user's profile
WileyWapiti
Member
Member


Joined: Jan 04, 2006
Posts: 298
Location: NW Colorado

PostPosted: Tue Jul 03, 2007 11:28 am    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

Vince, I have to say - we may be related! When I was about 12 or 13, my mom had bought both my sister and I cats, my cat mostly stayed outside killin' snakes, field mice and baby rabbits and liked pestering the horses, my sisters cat was as dumb as a post. I decided to mess with her one day so I let her watch me walk into the bathroom with my cat, I flushed the toilet for effect and walked out with the cat wrapped in a towel and told my siter "Well, I gave my cat a bath!", my sister was only 4 at the time, she scooped up her cat and dunked the poor thing right in there and flushed the toilet, my dad was laughing too hard at the sight of this cat, whiskers all drooped, to give chase and punish me.......the good old days!

_________________
Save the whales, collect the whole set!
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
tracker
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 08, 2006
Posts: 1175
Location: Manitoba, Canada

PostPosted: Tue Jul 03, 2007 12:33 pm    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

Oh I like this, bath time for kitty!

_________________
"If God hadn't meant for man to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat!"
Back to top
View user's profile
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10339
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Tue Jul 03, 2007 1:10 pm    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

Recommended you wear leather gloves...

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
1895ss
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2613
Location: Not Here...!!

PostPosted: Tue Jul 03, 2007 3:42 pm    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

I think the waters not deep enough ........... Shocked Surprised Smile

_________________
A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way.
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
rdncktink
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Mar 02, 2007
Posts: 476
Location: Hwaseong, South Korea

PostPosted: Tue Jul 03, 2007 4:49 pm    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

Bushmaster wrote:
Recommended you wear leather gloves...

And full face mask with kneck guard is helpful too.

_________________
Don't whine how bad your country is until you live in another.
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address Yahoo Messenger
tracker
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 08, 2006
Posts: 1175
Location: Manitoba, Canada

PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2007 1:53 pm    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

The cat enjoyed it so much she's still howling her appreciation, think I'll give the dog a turn at it this evening... Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

_________________
"If God hadn't meant for man to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat!"
Back to top
View user's profile
gelandangan
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5755
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2007 4:04 pm    Post subject: Re: Washing the Cat Reply with quote

Why bother wash them? their skin are too small and fur are too short for anything useful. Just shoot em!!

But I must admit, it is easier to take care of the carcass if they are clean, and a clean toilet bowl is a bonus indeed Very Happy

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 2
All times are GMT - 7 Hours
Go to page 1, 2  Next



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Advertisements
 


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by Dizfunkshunal :.