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Two Eggs
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13882
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Mon Apr 05, 2010 8:36 pm    Post subject: Two Eggs Reply with quote

Time for a sick, sick, sick joke Laughing Laughing

Two eggs boiling in a pot...one egg says to the other, check out my crack!

The other egg says... Stop teasing I'm not even hard yet!

Haha Haha Haha

Cheers, Vince

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Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7748
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Fri Jul 22, 2011 12:59 am    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

speaking of eggs
why are eggs round on the end and not square???


cause if they where square the chooks bum would slam shut...

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Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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gelandangan
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 22, 2011 1:06 am    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

Very Happy

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English Mike
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Joined: Jan 08, 2007
Posts: 1365
Location: Whitehaven, Cumbria, UK

PostPosted: Fri Jul 22, 2011 12:12 pm    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

Two New Zealanders in a bar.

One says to the other "what's a Hindu"?

"Lays eggs you daft sod" says his mate.
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13882
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 1:06 am    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

English Mike wrote:
Two New Zealanders in a bar.

One says to the other "what's a Hindu"?

"Lays eggs you daft sod" says his mate.

Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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dhc4ever
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Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2409
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 1:20 am    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

Poms making fun of Kiwis, does it get any better than this....:)

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Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7748
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 2:00 am    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

I say ol chap Very Happy steady on theres to be none of this Kiwi bashing Sad not that we cant take it on the chin wtf stiff upper lip Shocked what what.
tally ho the fox and all that rot Cool

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Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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English Mike
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Joined: Jan 08, 2007
Posts: 1365
Location: Whitehaven, Cumbria, UK

PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 11:02 am    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

Evil Devil
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Ominivision1
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Joined: Sep 20, 2010
Posts: 2984
Location: Iowa

PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 11:40 am    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

Haha Haha Haha Haha Good one Vince, the wife is still laughing.

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Limitations are but boundaries created inside our minds.
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dhc4ever
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Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2409
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 4:31 pm    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

spiffing what, absolutely spiffing.....

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Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13882
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 7:40 pm    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

Damn I love this place and the guys here. Everyone can take the mickey out of one another Poke and nobody takes it to heart or gets angry because they know that there is no malice intended. Bow Wave Bow Cheers Cheers Cheers

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7748
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 9:20 pm    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

oh yes I say jolly good show ol chaps Very Happy Fencing Very Happy
Ive just come inside after plucking a mallard duck the snow was starting to fall the temperature has been just above freezing all day. Shocked

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You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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diesel
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Joined: Nov 20, 2007
Posts: 90
Location: Watsontown Pa.

PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 10:40 pm    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

two bros from the hood came into a lot of money and joined a fox hunting club. after the first chase, they were called in by the huntmaster. he told them, when they sighted the fox, it was customary just to shout "tally ho" not "tally ho, MFs"
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13882
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 11:33 pm    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

Elvis wrote:
oh yes I say jolly good show ol chaps Very Happy Fencing Very Happy
Ive just come inside after plucking a mallard duck the snow was starting to fall the temperature has been just above freezing all day. Shocked

Duck for tea tonight Elvis...well done mate.

Been pretty cool here in Brisbane too...but not as cold as you guys have got it...no snow here mate.

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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dhc4ever
Super Member
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Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2409
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 12:37 am    Post subject: Re: Two Eggs Reply with quote

Elvis wrote:
oh yes I say jolly good show ol chaps Very Happy Fencing Very Happy
Ive just come inside after plucking a mallard duck the snow was starting to fall the temperature has been just above freezing all day. Shocked

Goto love those tasman sea lows eh.
It got down to -2c the otyher night, but its 20 - 22 c by lunch time Very Happy
Winter here is better than summer in Canberra, summer here can be a bit of a bastard though 40+c.

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Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
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