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Pilot and CoPilot
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
Super Member
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13607
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Wed Feb 02, 2011 2:31 am    Post subject: Pilot and CoPilot Reply with quote

A plane leaves Los Angeles airport under the control of a Jewish Captain.

His copilot is Chinese. It's the first time they've flown together, and an awkward silence between the two seems to indicate a mutual dislike.

Once they reach cruising altitude, the Jewish captain activates the auto-pilot, leans back in his seat, and mutters, 'I don't like Chinese.'


'No rike Chinese?' asks the copilot,'... ..why not?'

'You people bombed Pearl Harbor , that's why!'

'No, no,' the co-pilot protests, 'Chinese not bomb Peahl Hahbah! That Japanese, not Chinese.'

'Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese.. ...doesn't matter, you're all alike!'

There's a few minutes of silence.

'I no rike Jews either!' the copilot suddenly announces.

'Oh yeah, why not?' asks the captain.

'Jews sink Titanic says the co-pilot.'

'What? That's insane! Jews didn't sink the Titanic!' exclaims the Captain, 'It was an iceberg!'


'Iceberg, Goldberg, Greenberg, Rosenberg , ...no mattah...all same.

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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slimjim
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Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 7534
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Wed Feb 02, 2011 5:25 am    Post subject: Re: Pilot and CoPilot Reply with quote

Vince, thanks for the chuckle this morning!

_________________
"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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hunterjoe21
Super Member
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Joined: Mar 30, 2007
Posts: 1398
Location: Billings, Montana

PostPosted: Wed Feb 02, 2011 9:58 pm    Post subject: Re: Pilot and CoPilot Reply with quote

First time I've seen you recycle an old one Vince...

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My 1911 is more effective than your 911.
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Elvis
Super Member
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7514
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Wed Feb 02, 2011 11:29 pm    Post subject: Re: Pilot and CoPilot Reply with quote

ha vely god glasshopper Very Happy

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Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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Vince
Super Member
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13607
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Wed Feb 02, 2011 11:56 pm    Post subject: Re: Pilot and CoPilot Reply with quote

hunterjoe21 wrote:
First time I've seen you recycle an old one Vince...

Recycle...has this been posted before...AAAAAHHHHHHHH...NNNNOOOOO now I owe youse all one.

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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gelandangan
Super Member
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5864
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Thu Feb 03, 2011 12:14 am    Post subject: Re: Pilot and CoPilot Reply with quote

Laughing

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A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


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