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Enjoy a little bit of Biblical humour
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15715
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sun Apr 04, 2010 5:04 pm    Post subject: Enjoy a little bit of Biblical humour Reply with quote

Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married Ruth?

A. Ruthless.



Q. What do they call pastors in Germany ?

A. German Shepherds.


Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?

A. Noah He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.


Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?

A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet.


Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?

A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury. David's Triumph was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord.


Q.. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?

A. Samson. He brought the house down.


Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden ?

A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.


Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?

A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.


Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?

A... The area around Jordan The banks were always overflowing.


Q. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?

A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.


Q. Which Bible character had no parents?

A. Joshua, son of Nun.


Q. Why didn't they play cards on the Ark ?

A. Because Noah was standing on the deck.


PS: Did you know it's a sin for a woman to make coffee?
Yes, it's in the Bible. It says . . "He-brews" (Groan !!!)



Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Dimitri
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5944

PostPosted: Tue Apr 06, 2010 5:51 pm    Post subject: Re: Enjoy a little bit of Biblical humour Reply with quote

Haha

Dimitri

_________________
A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow.
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slimjim
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 8314
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Tue Apr 06, 2010 8:56 pm    Post subject: Re: Enjoy a little bit of Biblical humour Reply with quote

very creative!

_________________
"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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sniper
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Aug 18, 2005
Posts: 735
Location: Utah

PostPosted: Wed Apr 14, 2010 2:33 pm    Post subject: Re: Enjoy a little bit of Biblical humour Reply with quote

I CANNOT believe I read the whole thing! ROFL
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