You are getting this all wrong, I don't HAVE to pay that much for a date, actually the reason is 2 fold.
1) I never let the girl pay ... ok I lie for the first time in my life, the last date I went on a couple of weeks back I actually let her pay for the dinner, at 21 years old I gave in and let this one pay part of the date (I paid for the movie before though). I'm still wondering what was up with me that day that I let her pay but thats another story.
2) I generally like to go to semi-decent restaurants for dinners with girls, such as a decent steak house, why you might ask, because I want a good steak.
As for fringe benefits, If the girl is too easy, or too agar to get into my pants, and tries to do just that on the first date there is a 5 letter word to describe them. Otherwise I take it slow, by the 4th date or so hitting 3rd base is acceptable. Otherwise for hitting a "home run" I have not been with a girl I felt comfortable enough to take the risk. Since if I did knock up a girl, well I'd be sticking around for 20 years to raise the child together, whether or not I want to be with that girl for the next 20 years.