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Men Vs. Woman
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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whittling
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Joined: Apr 21, 2008
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Location: Texas (home state is Mass)

PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 2:23 am    Post subject: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

There are a number of clear differences between men and woman : Toiletries Woman : They have make-up cases with 42 things , nail clippers ,Hair brush ,Nail file , Hair Spray,floss . Thats just what they keep in their purse . Men have a razor ,a plastic comb borrowed from Dad , a bar of soap ,toothbrush ,and a Holiday Inn towel . Men on Hunting Nut have 3 pairs of shoes ,a pair of sneakers [worn with a oversized black suit to weddings and Funerals ]Milsurp combat boots and a pair of Mossy oak Muck boots . Women Have a pair of red shoes to Go with the red dress ...And 83 other pairs . Men wear T- shirts , blue jeans ,Mossy oak and milsurp clothes and All their clothes fit neatly into one large backpack .Women have a 2 closets one in your kids room and they still need 3 dressers to pack it in . Mens response to a haircut : ''Did you run getover by a lawn Mower ?'' Woman : Yes I went to that new barber down on Main St. I think it turned out well I got a perm of the sort to match my facail contours ..........

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rdncktink
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 10:10 am    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

IT'S NOT OUT FAULT Rant
Quote::
Woman : They have make-up cases with 42 things , nail clippers ,Hair brush ,Nail file , Hair Spray,floss .
They also have all of the stuff that the men ask them to carry. And a good women only needs 3 things in the make-up case
As for shoes. Most men can get away with 3-6 pair for home and work. Personally I just donated about 25 pair of shoes becuase they hurt like a mother everytime I wore them for work. The shoes I wear normaly are my tennis shoes, flip-flops, and a pair of "combat" boots with a zipper up the side.
At home I get to wear my jeans and t-shirts. For work it's the dresses that go with all those shoes. Or slacks which goes with all those shoes. Men get to wear the samething to work that they have on during the weekend. Or if they are really lucky it's a uniform.
For the first 3 things it's SOCIETY that says women need more things than men. I tried wearing tennis shoes to work on a day other than Friday like the male teachers and got asked what was wrong, did my feet hurt. The guys get told cool shoes. ITS NOT OUR FALT. Mad Mad

As for the hair cut. 3 times a year and that's only because I can't see through my bangs. My dad get more haircuts than I do. And he pays almost the same as I do for mine.

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whittling
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 11:04 am    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

Well that Attention to the you lookmust help .Woman don't go bald .

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Bushmaster
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 2:09 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

Oh yes they do...Not sos you'd know it but they do go bald...

Actually I like my women to carry all that junk. For one thing I like my women frilly (they are not supposed to be the "bull of the woods") and for another thing I don't have to carry so much stuff. They carry it... Very Happy

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hunterjoe21
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Joined: Mar 30, 2007
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PostPosted: Thu Jun 05, 2008 7:18 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

Reminds me of the "best" bad joke ever told...

Why do women wear make-up and perfume?....

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gelandangan
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PostPosted: Thu Jun 05, 2008 8:37 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

Hiding
Not going to be pulled there..

I am happy enuf with whatever the wifey carry on her bag.. as long as I am not carrying them, all is fine!!

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Vince
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PostPosted: Thu Jun 05, 2008 10:58 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

Move over Gelan...I'm hopping in there wiv ya...its gettin' dangerous out here.

Cheers, Vince

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OntheLasGallinas
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 2:40 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

I wouldn't touch that with a 10 foot pole!

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Dimitri
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 3:44 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

What women carry in their bags, as long as its not so heavy they are going to ask me to carry it I don't think it matters what she wants to carry. But I must admit most girls need to lose all that make up I think most women nowadays over do the make up. Confused

Guess its time to find a big rock and hide. Hiding

Dimitri

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rdncktink
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 4:24 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

Why are all the men trying to hide. Very Happy Razz I agree that most women carry to much.

What got me was the shoes. I have about 25 pair left, including boots, tennis, ect., but like I said I need them for work.

I agree women over do the make-up. For me mascara, eye shadow, and lipstick works for me. I do have a small hairbrush but when your A/C is a 255 you kindof need it before heading in to work.

Why on earth would a women ask the man to carry her purse? Confused If she can't carry it herslef clean the stupid thing out and make the man carry his stuff.

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Dimitri
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 4:33 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

Well I never got a women to carry anything for me, all I need to go from day to day is:

-> Keys
-> Wallet
-> Pocket Knife
-> Loose change
-> Cell Phone (set on total silence mode use it to check the time mainly)

I see no reason for any of that being in a womens purse. Shocked

As for my make up comment, other then lipstick any make up is too much make up if its noticeable in my opinion, I especially dislike that darker stuff women put on their eye lid. Shocked

Dimitri

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gelandangan
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 4:48 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

rdncktink wrote:
... What got me was the shoes. I have about 25 pair left, .........

Wow.. 25 pairs left.. so that make 50 pieces RIGHT right? Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

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The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

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gelandangan
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 4:55 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

Dimitri.. soon all we blokes gonna carry is our cell phone..

In this Great Land of Oz, we are already forbidden to carry pocket knife!!

And, if you read somewhere, soon the payment system gonna evolve into purely electronical transfer system, your cell phone gonna do all the banking and payin for you.
Also, ID's are going to be done by electronics means, viz Biometry (fingerprints, facial recognitions, implants etc)
That means loose change and wallet (for ID) is no longer necessary.

Next, again the ID systems can be connected to your security system (mine already is) so you only need your fingerprint to open your doors or start your car etc. So.. keys? whats that?

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A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
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Dimitri
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 5:13 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

Geland,

No matter how far technology gets, I'm gonna be at the end of the curve. I don't use telephone or internet banking. Nor do I plan on buying everything using a plastic card, rather have paper and metal bits to pay for stuff. Laughing

Dimitri

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rdncktink
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 6:25 pm    Post subject: Re: Men Vs. Woman Reply with quote

gelandangan wrote:
rdncktink wrote:
... What got me was the shoes. I have about 25 pair left, .........

Wow.. 25 pairs left.. so that make 50 pieces RIGHT right? Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

Embarassed Ya something like that. Look it's my one girly thing. I LOVE shoes, or at least did. At one point I had a different pair of high healed boots for everyday of the month. Hiding

If you believe things from the TV show Mythbusters the finger print thing can be circumvented. I've gotten so used to plastic that it's strange having change in my pocket.

Because of working at a school I'm not allowed to even have a metal nail file let alone a knife. Though there is one in my pick-up.

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