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IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14442
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2007 10:04 pm    Post subject: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

A bit of afternoon humour to lighten the day, peoples!


Patrick, who was on holiday from Ireland on Bondi beach couldn't seem to
make it with any of the girls. So he asked the local lifeguard for some advice.

Mate, it's obvious," says the lifeguard, "you're wearing them old baggy
swimming trunks that make ya look like an old geezer They're years outta
style. Your best bet is to grab yourself a pair of Speedos - about two sizes
too small and drop a fist-sized potato down inside 'em. I'm tellin' ya mate...you'll have all the babes ya want!"

The following weekend, Patrick hits the beach with his spanking new tight Speedos, and his fist-sized potato. Everybody on the beach was disgusted as he walked by, covering their faces, turning away, and laughing, looking
sick!

So Patrick went back to the lifeguard again and asked him, "What's wrong
now?"

JAHEESUS!" said the lifeguard,
*
*
*
*
*
*
"Mate. The potato goes in front!" Fart Yuck Yuck

Haha ROFL Laughing ROFL

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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rdncktink
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Joined: Mar 02, 2007
Posts: 476
Location: Hwaseong, South Korea

PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2007 10:12 pm    Post subject: Re: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

Very Happy Very Happy Laughing Laughing great way to end the day Laughing Laughing Very Happy Very Happy

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WileyWapiti
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Joined: Jan 04, 2006
Posts: 298
Location: NW Colorado

PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 6:06 am    Post subject: Re: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

words escape me.................. Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

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Bushmaster
Super Member
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10898
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 6:24 am    Post subject: Re: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

Why is it that Irish get all the heat? No...I'm not Irish. I'm of Scottish decent via Canada, but I must stand up for my bretheren...(even if they are our lowly bretheren). :-D[this oughta warm a few Irish hearts]

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DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
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tracker
Super Member
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Joined: Nov 08, 2006
Posts: 1175
Location: Manitoba, Canada

PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 9:45 am    Post subject: Re: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

Well I've got Irish and Scots both mixed in and not too many from Oz that can't claim different I'd guess since that's where England used to send all their outlaws, but the best thing about humor and the Irish is they can take and give.

Example...Irish joke about Irish folk....

What's the difference between the lace-curtain Irish and the shanty-town Irish?

The lace-curtain Irish are well enough bred to know to move the dishes over in the sink before they p### in it, aren't they?

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shrpshtrjoe
Super Red Neck Member
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Joined: Jan 26, 2005
Posts: 2954
Location: Maryland

PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 2:14 pm    Post subject: Re: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

ROFL That just aint right ROFL
Joe

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sniper
Super Member
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Joined: Aug 18, 2005
Posts: 735
Location: Utah

PostPosted: Sat Oct 06, 2007 6:20 am    Post subject: Re: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

What we have here, is a failure to communicate! Laughing
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lone wolf
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Joined: Jan 05, 2007
Posts: 33
Location: Medicine Hat, Alberta

PostPosted: Mon Oct 08, 2007 6:54 am    Post subject: Re: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

Vince, thanks for the laugh. I spent the first 20 years of my life in the North of Ireland, hopped on a plane to Canada in 1984 and never looked back. The Irish love Irish jokes, in fact we tell "Kerry jokes" (Kerry being an area in the south of Ireland).

Say, you know why God invented whiskey ? To stop the Irish from taking over the world ! Very Happy Very Happy
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Vince
Super Member
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14442
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Mon Oct 08, 2007 8:27 am    Post subject: Re: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

Gidday LW...I've never been to Ireland....been to London and Scotland, but not Ireland......although one of my daughters has. My Grandfather was born in Newry....just over the border into Northern Ireland. I gotta visit there one day....have a night on Guiness and either Jamesons or Tullamore Dew....the REAL Irish whisky.

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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lone wolf
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Member


Joined: Jan 05, 2007
Posts: 33
Location: Medicine Hat, Alberta

PostPosted: Mon Oct 08, 2007 10:00 am    Post subject: Re: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

Hey Vince, what's the mood like there after the loss to the Poms this weekend ? Not as bad as your neighbours though, I reckon there will be a day of national mourning in New Zealand.
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Vince
Super Member
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14442
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Mon Oct 08, 2007 8:46 pm    Post subject: Re: IRISH SPEEDOS or PATRICK'S BUDGIE SMUGGLERS Reply with quote

lone wolf wrote:
Hey Vince, what's the mood like there after the loss to the Poms this weekend ? Not as bad as your neighbours though, I reckon there will be a day of national mourning in New Zealand.

As best I can tell things aren't too bad, although to be honest I don't really follow the Rugby. Rugby League and Cricket has a much bigger following out here than Rugby Union.

As for the "Kay One Dubya Ones" (KIWIs), you gotta feel sorry for them, we can here the moaning and groaning over here in Australia from them.....although from what I saw and heard on the TV, the decision was a bit controversial. But then again, anything that involves the French seems to go that way.

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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