A vampire bat came flapping in from the night, face all covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon all the other bats smelt the blood & began hassling him about where he got it.
He told them to piss off & let him get some sleep, but they persisted until he finally gave in. 'OK, follow me', he said & flew out of the cave with hundreds of excited bats behind him. Down through a valley they went across a river & into a huge forest.
Finally he slowed down & all other bats excitedly milled around him, tongues hanging out for blood.
'Do you see that large oak tree over there?' he asked.
YES, YES, YES!!!' the bats all screamed in a frenzy.
'Good for you!' said the first bat,
'Because I @#*%ing didn't.'