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Holiday Greetings
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14414
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 8:19 pm    Post subject: Holiday Greetings Reply with quote

Holiday Greetings

I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to my friends, but it is so difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with lawyers yesterday, and on their advice I wish to say the following:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the summer solstice holiday, practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great (not to imply that Australia is necessarily greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms:

This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her / himself or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

Disclaimer: No trees were harmed in the sending of this message; however, a significant number of electrons were slightly inconvenienced.


Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Dimitri
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5910

PostPosted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 8:24 pm    Post subject: Re: Holiday Greetings Reply with quote

Haha

I like these that have came out this year poking fun at being PC. Very Happy

Dimitri

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A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow.
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Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10875
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 9:45 pm    Post subject: Re: Holiday Greetings Reply with quote

MERRY CHRISTMAS ONE AND ALL...

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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1895ss
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2613
Location: Not Here...!!

PostPosted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 10:53 pm    Post subject: Re: Holiday Greetings Reply with quote

Christmas Merry Christmas To Everyone ......... Christmas

_________________
A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way.
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Dimitri
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5910

PostPosted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 11:13 pm    Post subject: Re: Holiday Greetings Reply with quote

See the front page anyone ?? Smile

Dimitri

_________________
A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow.
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gelandangan
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6077
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 2:27 am    Post subject: Re: Holiday Greetings Reply with quote

Dimitri wrote:
See the front page anyone ?? Smile

Dimitri

Can't sleep counting those... wtf Very Happy

Gelan

Oh yeah.. Merry Christmas to all too..


(sorry to hijack your thread VInce Smile )

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
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Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14414
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 6:25 am    Post subject: Re: Holiday Greetings Reply with quote

Gidday Gelan. You haven't hijacked it mate...its cool.

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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popgun
Member
Member


Joined: Jan 26, 2005
Posts: 735
Location: Mitchell, GA, U.S.A. (2007 pop. 191)

PostPosted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 9:30 pm    Post subject: Re: Holiday Greetings Reply with quote


Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to each and every HuntingNut Very Happy

May a new gun, bow, reloading gear and components be under your tree Christmas morning. Very Happy

_________________
Safe shooting,
Chris Young, aka: popgun, Moderator
I don't know everything but I have made most of the mistakes already and lived through many of them.
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