HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: B.c.white
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 1
Overall: 12534

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 48
BOT: 4
Total: 52
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Forums
02: Forums
03: Home
04: Forums
05: Forums
06: Forums
07: Forums
08: Forums
09: Forums
10: PointBlank Ballistics
11: Forums
12: Forums
13: Forums
14: Your Account
15: Forums
16: Forums
17: Forums
18: News
19: Forums
20: News
21: Forums
22: Forums
23: Forums
24: Forums
25: Forums
26: Forums
27: Forums
28: Forums
29: Forums
30: Forums
31: Forums
32: Forums
33: Forums
34: Forums
35: Photo Albums
36: Forums
37: Forums
38: Forums
39: Forums
40: Forums
41: Forums
42: Forums
43: News
44: Forums
45: Forums
46: Forums
47: Forums
48: Forums
  BOT:
01: Forums
02: Forums
03: Forums
04: Forums

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 304
 Pictures: 2351
  · Views: 315910
  · Votes: 1303
  · Comments: 85
 

Support our Advertisers

cats
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Go to page 1, 2  Next
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
dhc4ever
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2282
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 3:07 am    Post subject: cats Reply with quote

Adam and Eve said, “Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us.”

And God said, “I will create a companion for you that will be with you and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourselves.”

And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam and Eve.

And it was a good animal.

And God was pleased.

And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve and he wagged his tail.

And Adam said, “Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal.”

And God said, ” I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, and you will call him DOG.”

And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to them and loved them.

And they were comforted.

And God was pleased.

And Dog was content and wagged his tail.

After a while, it came to pass that an angel came to the Lord and said, “Lord, Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like peacocks and they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that they are loved, but perhaps too well.”

And God said, “I will create for them a companion who will be with them and who will see them as they are. The companion will remind them of their limitations, so they will know that they are not always worthy of adoration.”

And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.

And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam and Eve gazed into Cat’s eyes, they were reminded that they were not the supreme beings.

And Adam and Eve learned humility.

And they were greatly improved.

And God was pleased.

And Dog was happy.

And Cat didn’t give a crap one way or the other.

_________________
Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
Back to top
View user's profile
Suzanne
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 27, 2009
Posts: 3282
Location: Eugene, Oregon

PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 6:06 am    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

Ain't it true!



Suz

_________________
May the moon keep you centered,
May the sun keep you dancing,
And the stars shed light on your dreams.
Back to top
View user's profile
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10392
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 8:30 am    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

I have been told that DOG serves man and man serves CAT. To CAT we are "staff".

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
PaulS
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Feb 18, 2006
Posts: 3432
Location: South-Eastern Washington - the State

PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 4:35 pm    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

I don't know... I have taught two cats to sit, roll over and lie down on command. You just have to use a different thought pattern with cats than with dogs - that and remember that the cat is not really there to please anyone but themselves - kind of like an addict.

_________________
Paul
__________________
Speer, Lyman, Hodgdon, Sierra, and Hornady = reliable loading data
So and So's pages on the internet = NOT reliable loading data
Always check data against manuals
NEVER exceed maximum listed loads
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
radar
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Oct 01, 2008
Posts: 1094
Location: North Island New Zealand

PostPosted: Tue May 13, 2014 5:55 pm    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

What were your cats addicted to Paul….I'm interested ….

_________________
People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

George Orwell
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail Photo Gallery
dhc4ever
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2282
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 1:26 am    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

Didnt happen without video Paul........
I'd be interested as well, all I get is a distainful stare at anytime except meal time.

_________________
Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
Back to top
View user's profile
Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13252
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 5:06 am    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

Bushy got it in one...cats don't have owners, they have staff.

When. Cat is licking you it isn't showing affection...it is tasting you for future reference.

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
Tremblay
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 1622
Location: Malta, Montana

PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 7:26 am    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

Cat is licking you it isn't showing affection...it is tasting you for future reference

HEHAW

_________________
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
gelandangan
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5770
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 2:05 pm    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

Cat? where? Blooompfht!!

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website
DallanC
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: Jan 18, 2005
Posts: 3168
Location: Utah

PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 2:27 pm    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

Here's a cat I wouldn't mind:

www.youtube.com/embed/...r_embedded


-DallanC
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
dhc4ever
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2282
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 2:36 pm    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

Just saw this on the morning news, very unusual cat behaviour, but well done that cat.
The dog needs a bullet.

_________________
Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
Back to top
View user's profile
DallanC
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: Jan 18, 2005
Posts: 3168
Location: Utah

PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 2:41 pm    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

I had a cat growing up, MEAN ole Tom, he was kindof the same way. Didn't allow any dogs on "his" turf. He was all torn up by the end of his life, ears shredded, scars all over. Mean SOB for sure.


-DallanC
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
gelandangan
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5770
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 3:14 pm    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

Well Ok, thats an exception.. I may even tolerate that cat..

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website
Tremblay
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 1622
Location: Malta, Montana

PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 4:28 pm    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

Now that's a cat

_________________
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
Suzanne
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 27, 2009
Posts: 3282
Location: Eugene, Oregon

PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2014 6:16 pm    Post subject: Re: cats Reply with quote

That was cool, wouldn't it be interesting to see a close-up in slow motion of the cat and dog, just to see where the cat actually contacted, because that dog really scooted.

Suz

_________________
May the moon keep you centered,
May the sun keep you dancing,
And the stars shed light on your dreams.
Back to top
View user's profile
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 2
All times are GMT - 7 Hours
Go to page 1, 2  Next



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Advertisements
 


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by Dizfunkshunal :.