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Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one!
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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radar
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Joined: Oct 01, 2008
Posts: 1088
Location: North Island New Zealand

PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 12:52 pm    Post subject: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake.

He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?'
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
'Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.

2. The bouncer is a blonde girl with a 'Billy-Club'.

3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.

4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.

5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

'Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy. Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?'

The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, 'No, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.'

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Ominivision1
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 5:31 pm    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

Very Happy Good thing he's blind cuz he won't see whats gonna hit him.

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Limitations are but boundaries created inside our minds.
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slimjim
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Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 7:09 pm    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

Ok, Radar, I was wondering how a good a cowboy joke would be coming from a guy downloader. This was great! LOL!!

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"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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radar
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Location: North Island New Zealand

PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 7:39 pm    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

Hey we've got cowboys here, just they're a bit different from what you're thinking. Ours are called Cow Cockies and they produce Milk (white gold). I'm from a Cow Cockie family on both sides. Both my grandparents owned Dairy farms, my dad was in the industry and now I pick up drunk young cow cockies on friday and Saturday nites in town.......sound familiar?

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George Orwell
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
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Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 7:46 pm    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

very good Radar. the Hamiltonian hairy bumed cow workers must have tamed down since I was a cadet. Do they still hang out down by the lake???

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Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
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Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 10:05 pm    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

Elvis wrote:
...Hamiltonian hairy bumed cow workers

Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha

Not a very pretty mental picture Elvis, but funny nonetheless mate

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Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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gelandangan
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5675
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 10:08 pm    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

WAITAMINUTE waitaminute!!!

COW-boys in NZ? wtf

An here I am thinking that they are all EWE-boys...

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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2012 10:29 pm    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

DOH Hiding scared Hiding

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Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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dhc4ever
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Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2233
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 1:39 pm    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

Seems the "cold war" is heating up a tad......

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Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
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Bushmaster
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
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Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 9:06 am    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

And here we go again with the "sheep jokes"......

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DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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radar
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Joined: Oct 01, 2008
Posts: 1088
Location: North Island New Zealand

PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 1:47 pm    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

I'd hate to say it but theres probably more cows in NZ than sheep these days. And anyway isn't it the Aussies exporting sheep because they've got more than enough for themselves.

Hamilton hairy bum cow workers ......LOL

Nah we've got the 'party precinct' all our pubs and clubs in one small area (1 city block 20 establishments) and its carnage.....fights, drunks, vomit, S..T everywhere and after 3am the council come and clean it up and make it all nice and clean again so the good people of Hamilton can see how civilised they all are....NOT!

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People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

George Orwell
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Elvis
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Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2012 2:19 am    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

is there still a barn bar in Eureka??? that was a great hang out. we would drink black russians till the coke ran out then open a can of beer( usually waikato Yuck ) then use the rest of the can instead of coke wtf
gee they were fun times but Im suprised I survived them Very Happy

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Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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radar
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Location: North Island New Zealand

PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2012 5:36 am    Post subject: Re: Blind cow boy - might have already posted this one! Reply with quote

Barn bar in eureka? ...... not in the last 15 years! Thats a drive thru village now. You need to come up and see the 'Tron' Its an eye opener
P.S. Tron is a nickname for Hamiltron, aka Boganville

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