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THIS IS SICK, WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14125
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 7:36 pm    Post subject: THIS IS SICK, WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS Reply with quote

At least one of the following ought to bring a smile...Al
1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up On It.

2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way, Unique Up On It.

3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
They Take The Psycho Path.

4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
You Boil The Hell Out Of It.

5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
Dam!

6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
Polaroid's.

7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
A Stick.

8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
Nacho Cheese.

9. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.

10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
Quattro Sinko.

11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
Spoiled Milk.

12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire! ?
Frostbite.

13.. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
A Nervous Wreck.

14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
Anyone Can Roast Beef.

15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
Right Where You Left Him.

16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
Because They Have Big Fingers.

17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
Because It Scares The Dog.

18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
Sanka.

19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?
The Location Of The Dirt Bag.

20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.

21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
A Bad Golfer Goes Whack, Dang!
A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.

22. How Is a TexasTornado And a AlabamaDivorce The Same?
Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer!

Now, admit it. At least one of these made you smile! Laughing

See, I told ya it was sick. Very Happy Cool

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Dimitri
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5911

PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 7:43 pm    Post subject: Re: THIS IS SICK, WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS Reply with quote

ROFL

Great ones! Very Happy

Dimitri

_________________
A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow.
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1895ss
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2613
Location: Not Here...!!

PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 7:50 pm    Post subject: Re: THIS IS SICK, WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS Reply with quote

Vince wrote:


16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
Because They Have Big Fingers.Cheers, Vince

ROFL ROFL You see some people like that at the Mall...........!!!!!!! ROFL ROFL

_________________
A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way.
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shrpshtrjoe
Super Red Neck Member
Super Red Neck Member


Joined: Jan 26, 2005
Posts: 2954
Location: Maryland

PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 7:55 pm    Post subject: Re: THIS IS SICK, WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS Reply with quote

Where do you come up with um all Vince ROFL There funny Keep um coming buddy.
Joe

_________________
"MOLON LABE"

P E T A
People Eating Tasty Animals
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