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Have you reached this point in your life?
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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robfromaz1977
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Joined: Aug 03, 2005
Posts: 179
Location: Arizona's White Mountains

PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 11:14 am    Post subject: Have you reached this point in your life? Reply with quote

Cutting pills





An old man goes into a drug store to buy some Viagra and asks,'Can I have 6 tablets, cut into quarters?'

'I can cut them for you,' said the pharmacist, 'but a quarter tablet will not give you a full erection.'


'I am 96,' said the old man. 'I don't want an erection. I just want it
sticking out far enough so I don't piss on my slippers.'
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13519
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 10:31 pm    Post subject: Re: Have you reached this point in your life? Reply with quote

Not there yet Rob....but it worries me that I am not that far off it.

Laughing ROFL

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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gelandangan
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5843
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2009 11:51 pm    Post subject: Re: Have you reached this point in your life? Reply with quote

I think by then I'll be 6 feet under .. Hopefully never need them cut.


That reminds me of a friend who like to quote:

"I want to be shot
with both barrel of
a double barrel shotgun
At the back of my head
at the age of 90
in the wedding bed of
a jealous husband."

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
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1895ss
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Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2613
Location: Not Here...!!

PostPosted: Tue Feb 10, 2009 12:01 am    Post subject: Re: Have you reached this point in your life? Reply with quote

I always say............. "I want to be shot at the age of 95 by a 25 year old jealous husband." Smile

_________________
A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way.
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13519
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Tue Feb 10, 2009 12:08 am    Post subject: Re: Have you reached this point in your life? Reply with quote

gee guys....I don't wanna be shot by a 25 yr old jealous husband...I want to make the bugger envious, embarrassed and ashamed.

Very Happy Very Happy Laughing Laughing

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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10spotterminator
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Joined: Aug 27, 2008
Posts: 167
Location: Redmond, Oregon

PostPosted: Tue Feb 10, 2009 6:55 pm    Post subject: Re: Have you reached this point in your life? Reply with quote

Gotta figure at that age if the husband would let me finish I'd shoot MYSELF !!!
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Bushmaster
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10506
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Tue Feb 10, 2009 9:24 pm    Post subject: Re: Have you reached this point in your life? Reply with quote

I have a plan...To be in bed with an 18 year old at the fine age of 100 and get caught by my wife...That should do it (if she would quit laughing)...

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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Bushmaster
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10506
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Tue Feb 10, 2009 9:27 pm    Post subject: Re: Have you reached this point in your life? Reply with quote

And I know the next question...You will ask. "Which one?" And I'll answer. "Both of them"....

There...Beat you guys to it.... ROFL

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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gelandangan
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5843
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Tue Feb 10, 2009 10:49 pm    Post subject: Re: Have you reached this point in your life? Reply with quote

Bushy, that would be like dog chasing cars,
you couldn't have anything to do with her, even if it happens.. Nananana ROFL

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
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