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Vince Site Admin
Joined: May 25, 2005 Posts: 15715 Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
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Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 3:01 am Post subject: British humour |
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This one is for our mate in Pomgolia...English Mike.
It has been announced that the police are going to be allowed to use water cannons on rioters.
They are putting some Persil washing Powder in to stop the coloureds running.
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Muslims have crashed a speedboat into the Thames barrier in London .
Police think it might be the start of Ram-a-dam.
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Following the riots in Tottenham, it's important to remind ourselves that not all black people are stereotypical thieves and arsonists.
The vast majority are drug dealers and rapists.
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Ngogo Mwambi has to travel 5 miles every day for fresh water, 7 miles
every day for food & 10 miles every day for medicine for him & his
family. This is because the daft bastard and all his mates torched the
Peckham Spar, Tottenham KFC and Hackney Medical Centre and now he has to walk to Croydon for his breakfast.
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Riots in Wythenshawe last month caused over £1 million worth of improvements.
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Muslims have gone on the rampage in Bradford , killing anyone who's English.
Police fear the death toll could be as high as 5.
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Sat opposite an Indian lady on the train today, she shut her eyes and stopped breathing.
I thought she was dead, until I saw the red spot on her forehead and realised she was just on standby.
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They've had to cancel the panto 'Jack & the Beanstalk' in Birmingham , Bristol , Oldham, Bradford, Burnley, Leicester, Luton and London :
Apparently the giant couldn't smell any Englishmen.
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Years ago it was suggested that, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away."
But since all the doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon sandwich works a treat!
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Cheers, Vince
_________________ Cheers, Vince
Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done) |
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Elvis Super Member
Joined: Jul 27, 2008 Posts: 9253 Location: south island New Zealand
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Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 3:55 am Post subject: Re: British humour |
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oh I say they are jolly good ol chap golly spiffing what what.
_________________ You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers! |
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Ghost Member
Joined: Nov 20, 2011 Posts: 25 Location: European Forrest
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stovepipe Super Member
Joined: Sep 25, 2008 Posts: 4877 Location: Pine, Az.
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TRBLSHTR Super Member
Joined: Mar 23, 2007 Posts: 1071 Location: Lower 48's-left coast(near portlandia)
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stovepipe Super Member
Joined: Sep 25, 2008 Posts: 4877 Location: Pine, Az.
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English Mike Super Member
Joined: Jan 08, 2007 Posts: 1709 Location: Whitehaven, Cumbria, UK
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stovepipe Super Member
Joined: Sep 25, 2008 Posts: 4877 Location: Pine, Az.
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Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 2:05 pm Post subject: Re: British humour |
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Rhu-rho!
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Ominivision1 Super Member
Joined: Sep 20, 2010 Posts: 2984 Location: Iowa
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Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 2:27 pm Post subject: Re: British humour |
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English Mike wrote: |
It doesn't bother me, especially as we call our Aussie cousins far worse.Baaaaa!!! |
_________________ Regards
Limitations are but boundaries created inside our minds. |
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Vince Site Admin
Joined: May 25, 2005 Posts: 15715 Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
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Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 7:58 pm Post subject: Re: British humour |
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_________________ Cheers, Vince
Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done) |
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camel Member
Joined: May 30, 2011 Posts: 129 Location: Hillston Nsw Australia
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Bushmaster Super Member
Joined: Jun 12, 2005 Posts: 11393 Location: Ava, Missouri
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Posted: Fri Nov 25, 2011 8:40 am Post subject: Re: British humour |
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And here starts the "sheep jokes" again...
_________________ I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...
DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote... |
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RePete Super Member
Joined: Aug 15, 2005 Posts: 1035 Location: Gods Country
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tikkat3 Super Member
Joined: Jul 30, 2006 Posts: 800
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Posted: Fri Nov 25, 2011 2:53 pm Post subject: Re: British humour |
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Or the cliff........
Who highjacked this thread? Bushy, RePete.
Get back on topic and start bashing [laughing with] the poms.
Or
I'd like to hear a bit of Oz bashing, hey Skip
Kanga or convict
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English Mike Super Member
Joined: Jan 08, 2007 Posts: 1709 Location: Whitehaven, Cumbria, UK
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Posted: Fri Nov 25, 2011 4:10 pm Post subject: Re: British humour |
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A Kiwi finally makes his fortune and is having his dream house built. As he talks to the architect on how he wants the house built he says, 'See that tree there, don't cut it down because under that tree I made love for the first time.'
The architect says he understands the sentimental value of the tree and he will design the house so that the tree isn't harmed.
Then the man says, 'And you see that tree over there, I don't want it cut either, because her mother stood there and watched as we made love.'
The architect could hardly believe his ears,'That's incredible, what did her mother say?'
'Baaaaaa.'
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