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Hunting Lawyers !!
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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whittling
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Joined: Apr 21, 2008
Posts: 586
Location: Texas (home state is Mass)

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 3:33 am    Post subject: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Very Happy 2 lawyers were out hunting big game . One yelled to the other -'' I found elk tracks .'' the other attorney said '' No ,there moose .See how big and wide and the wood slats! ''Elk !''Moose !'' Elk ! They were still arguing when the train ran them other ....

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Service, honor and courage, without these a warrior is nothing.
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OntheLasGallinas
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Joined: Aug 23, 2007
Posts: 1042
Location: South Texas

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 3:53 am    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Now that's funny, I don't care who you are! ROFL

Cary

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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14597
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 4:23 am    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Yep...about as funny as they come mate....we can only hope that its not a joke...but in fact a true story.

Laughing

Cheers, Vince

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Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
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OntheLasGallinas
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Joined: Aug 23, 2007
Posts: 1042
Location: South Texas

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 4:30 am    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Vince,

I was thinking the same thing! Foul (as in unclean, stinking, rank, polluted, tainted, soiled…) profession. Sorry if I insulted anyone on this forum, but thats the way it is.

Cary

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RePete
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Joined: Aug 15, 2005
Posts: 941
Location: Gods Country

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 5:42 am    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

If you look up Lawyer in the dictionary it says see Used Car Salesman, you then look up Used Car Salesman it says see Liar, you look up Liar and it says see Lawyer.

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Stercus Accidit = Sh*t Happens in Latin.

Nice try = You Suck spelled different.

My parents spanked me as a child. As a result, I now suffer from a psychological condition known as RESPECT FOR OTHERS.
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Bushmaster
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10985
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 5:49 am    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Now that's a good one RePete... Laughing

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DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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Pumpkinslinger
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Joined: Sep 22, 2007
Posts: 4699
Location: NC foothills

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 7:10 am    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

One of my all time favorites...

What do you call 2000 lawyers on a sinking cruise ship?




A good start!!

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Mike

"I ain't no better than anybody else, and there ain't nobody better than me!" Ma Kettle
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14597
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 7:22 am    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Or....how do you stop a Lawyer from drowning...
TAKE YA FOOT OFF HIS HEAD !!!

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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slots918
Member
Member


Joined: Jun 28, 2008
Posts: 138

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 8:56 am    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Or....how do you stop a Lawyer from drowning...
TAKE YA FOOT OFF HIS HEAD !!!

Vince, why stop???????????
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Weinbender
Member
Member


Joined: Sep 13, 2007
Posts: 226
Location: Manitoba, Canada

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 9:25 am    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Vince wrote:
Or....how do you stop a Lawyer from drowning...
TAKE YA FOOT OFF HIS HEAD !!!

Cheers, Vince

Vince, once again u made my day!!

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d_hoffman
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Joined: Feb 13, 2007
Posts: 696
Location: Chillicothe, Ohio

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 12:14 pm    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Why would anybody want to hunt a lawyer? The paperwork and red tape just to obtain a license would take months to get proccessed let alone the amount of paperwork you'd need if you got one.

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Last edited by d_hoffman on Sat Jul 26, 2008 12:39 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Bushmaster
Super Member
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 10985
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 12:17 pm    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Don't forget to get a tag with a barbed pin so when you tag them on the a$$ the tag will stay...

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I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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Vince
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Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14597
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 8:17 pm    Post subject: Re: Hunting Lawyers !! Reply with quote

Tags ??? I thought it was always open season with no bag limit !!!

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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