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Murphy's Law of Campfire Building
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
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Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Sep 05, 2015 3:51 am    Post subject: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

Murphy's Law of Campfire Building

1. Split dead limb into fragments and shave one fragment into slivers.
2. Bandage left thumb. Mad
3. Chop other fragments into smaller fragments.
4. Bandage left foot. Mad
5. Make a structure of slivers (including those embedded in one's hand).
6. Light match. Mad
7. Light match. Mad
8. Repeat “I’m a Happy Camper” and light match.
9. Apply match to slivers, add wood fragments, blow gently into base of flames.
10. Apply burn ointment to nose. Embarassed
11. When fire is burning, collect more wood.
12. When fire is burning well, add all remaining firewood.
13. After thunderstorm has passed, repeat the above steps. burr

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Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
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Bushmaster
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Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Sat Sep 05, 2015 7:31 am    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

Been there...Done that.

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gelandangan
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 05, 2015 2:55 pm    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

Wood fire? meh who needs wood fire?
I got me my propane..

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Elvis
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 05, 2015 4:02 pm    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

unfortunately in this ever increasing PC kumbyearr world lighting a fire is a dying art.
Ive done it at bush line in the snow with sleaty crap blowing all around us.
my Daddy taught me good.

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PaulS
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2015 1:36 am    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

I was taught how to start a fire in the rain forests of western Washington. I can make two bricks burn!

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Paul
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Vince
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2015 2:01 am    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

PaulS wrote:
I was taught how to start a fire in the rain forests of western Washington. I can make two bricks burn!

...by just rubbing them together, underwater, in a thunderstorm. Laughing Laughing

I am a bit the same Paul. My Dad taught me how to light a fire, even with wet wood.

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Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
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Bushmaster
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
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Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2015 6:36 am    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

Bricks? Burn? Sense when do you find "bricks" in the rain forests of the Great Northwest?

I make two rocks burn ["under water in a thunderstorm"].

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DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
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Suzanne
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Location: Eugene, Oregon

PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2015 7:07 am    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

What's really cool tho is Paulie can get his skin to burn just by standing outside.


Suz

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PaulS
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Joined: Feb 18, 2006
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2015 7:59 pm    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

Suzanne wrote:
What's really cool tho is Paulie can get his skin to burn just by standing outside.


Suz

All it takes is about 20 minutes in the sun Suz! I got the back of my hands sunburned out at the range one day this summer. They are always exposed - who gets the back of their hands sunburned? If I get a sunburn, I blister - not pretty, so I wear long pants, long sleeve shirts and a cowboy hat any time I am outside.

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Paul
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Bushmaster
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2015 9:19 pm    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

Excellent atire...

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I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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Suzanne
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Location: Eugene, Oregon

PostPosted: Mon Sep 07, 2015 6:50 am    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

You know what Paulie, so do I, an every year I go to the dermatologist and get little pre-cancerous buggers burned off, it's never-ending torture. My hands and neck are the brownest parts of me....no don't imagine it.


Suz

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PaulS
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 07, 2015 5:44 pm    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

Aw Suz, If it's my imagination you will always be a dream come true! Even after we meet You will always be a beautiful woman. Physical appearance means very little to me. It is the heart and soul of a person that I remember.

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Paul
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 07, 2015 6:49 pm    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

Well said mate. Beautiful words for a beautiful lady Paul.

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Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Suzanne
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Location: Eugene, Oregon

PostPosted: Tue Sep 08, 2015 5:41 am    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

But ..... you haven't seen my goiter...that's the turn-yer-head part of "she turns heads".


Suz

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Vince
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Posts: 13024
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 08, 2015 6:57 am    Post subject: Re: Murphy's Law of Campfire Building Reply with quote

Suzanne wrote:
But ..... you haven't seen my goiter...that's the turn-yer-head part of "she turns heads".


Suz

Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha Haha

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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