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Mans best friend
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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dhc4ever
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2242
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Thu Nov 10, 2011 3:58 pm    Post subject: Mans best friend Reply with quote

Why Some Men Should & Sometimes Do Have a Dog Instead of a Wife:


1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.



2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.



3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.



4. A dog's parents never visit.



5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.


6. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.



7. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.



8. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another
dog?"




9. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.



10. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.



11. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.




And last, but not least:


12. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff!

To test this theory:
Lock your wife and your dog in the garage for an hour. Then open it and see who's happy to see you

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Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 6969
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2011 1:59 am    Post subject: Re: Mans best friend Reply with quote

very true and what do you get if you spell dog backwards??

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You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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Vince
Super Member
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13065
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2011 2:22 am    Post subject: Re: Mans best friend Reply with quote

Elvis wrote:
very true and what do you get if you spell dog backwards??

A dyslexic pet owner maybe? Very Happy Very Happy Razz Razz Razz

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 6969
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2011 2:25 am    Post subject: Re: Mans best friend Reply with quote

the dyslectic anarcist sold his soul to santa...

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Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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Ominivision1
Super Member
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Joined: Sep 20, 2010
Posts: 2985
Location: Iowa

PostPosted: Sat Dec 24, 2011 1:53 pm    Post subject: Re: Mans best friend Reply with quote

Flyingbird=Spammer

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Limitations are but boundaries created inside our minds.
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English Mike
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jan 08, 2007
Posts: 1127
Location: Whitehaven, Cumbria, UK

PostPosted: Sat Dec 24, 2011 11:01 pm    Post subject: Re: Mans best friend Reply with quote

Ominivision1 wrote:
Flyingbird=Spammer

I'd rather have turkey than Spam. Very Happy

You're right; tiz a pest.
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