HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: Z-max
New Today: 4
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 12494

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 58
BOT: 3
Total: 61
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Forums
02: Photo Albums
03: Forums
04: Photo Albums
05: Forums
06: Forums
07: Forums
08: News
09: Photo Albums
10: Forums
11: Forums
12: Photo Albums
13: Home
14: Forums
15: Forums
16: Forums
17: Forums
18: Forums
19: Forums
20: Forums
21: Photo Albums
22: Forums
23: Forums
24: Forums
25: Forums
26: Forums
27: Forums
28: PointBlank Ballistics
29: Your Account
30: Forums
31: Photo Albums
32: Forums
33: Home
34: Forums
35: Forums
36: Forums
37: Your Account
38: Forums
39: Forums
40: Your Account
41: Forums
42: Forums
43: Forums
44: Forums
45: Forums
46: Forums
47: Forums
48: Forums
49: Home
50: Forums
51: Forums
52: Forums
53: Forums
54: Forums
55: Forums
56: Forums
57: Forums
58: Forums
  BOT:
01: Forums
02: Forums
03: Forums

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 304
 Pictures: 2343
  · Views: 307990
  · Votes: 1302
  · Comments: 85
 

Support our Advertisers

Heaven entrance exam
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
dhc4ever
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2263
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 12:04 pm    Post subject: Heaven entrance exam Reply with quote

A Blonde was sent on her way up to Heaven. Upon arrival, a concerned
St Peter met her at the Pearly Gates. 'I'm sorry,' St Peter said;
'But Heaven is suffering from an overload of goodly souls and we have
been forced to put up an Entrance Exam for new arrivals to ease the
burden of Heavenly Arrivals.'

'That's cool' said the blonde, 'What does the Entrance Exam consist of?'

'Just three questions' said St Peter.

'Which are?' asked the blonde.

'The first,' said St Peter, 'is, which two days of the week start with
the letter 'T' '?
The second is 'How many seconds are there in a year?'
The third is 'What was the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?'

'Now,' said St Peter, 'Go away and think about those questions and
when I call upon you, I shall expect you to have those answers for
me.'

So the blonde went away and gave those three questions some
considerable thought (I expect you to do the same).

The following morning, St Peter called upon the blonde and asked if
she had considered the questions, to which she replied, 'I have.'

'Well then,' said St Peter, 'Which two days of the week start with the
letter T?'

The blonde said, 'Today and Tomorrow..'

St Peter pondered this answer for some time, and decided that indeed
the answer can be applied to the question.

'Well then, could I have your answer to the second of the three
questions?' St Peter went on, 'how many seconds in a year?'

The Blonde replied, 'Twelve!'

'Only twelve?' exclaimed St Peter, 'How did you arrive at that figure?'

'Easy,' said the blonde, 'there's the second of January, the second of
February, right through to the second of December, giving a total of
twelve seconds.'

St Peter looked at the blonde and said, 'I need some time to consider
your answer before I can give you a decision.' And he walked away
shaking his head.

A short time later, St Peter returned to the Blonde. 'I'll allow the
answer to stand, but you need to get the third and final question
absolutely correct to be allowed into Heaven. Now, can you tell me the
answer to the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?'

The blonde replied: 'Of the three questions, I found this the easiest
to answer.'

'Really!' exclaimed St Peter, 'And what is the answer?'

'It's Andy.'

'Andy??'

'Yes, Andy,' said the blonde

This totally floored St Peter, and he paced this way and that,
deliberating the answer. Finally, he could not stand the suspense any
longer, and turning to the blonde, asked 'How in God's name did you
arrive at THAT answer?'

'Easy' said the blonde,

'Andy sat, Andy watched, Andy waited till his billy boiled.'

And the blonde entered Heaven...

_________________
Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
Back to top
View user's profile
gelandangan
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 5760
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 3:10 pm    Post subject: Re: Heaven entrance exam Reply with quote

Laughing

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website
RePete
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Aug 15, 2005
Posts: 777

PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 6:22 pm    Post subject: Re: Heaven entrance exam Reply with quote

Worship

_________________
Proud member of the WTFDTSG Club.

Stercus Accidit = Sh*t Happens in Latin.

Nice try = You Suck spelled different.
Back to top
View user's profile
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT - 7 Hours



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Advertisements
 


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by Dizfunkshunal :.